ENEMY: The Epilogue

Chapter Ten: Epilogue - A New Approach

May 15th, 1967 – Seoul Police Department

Lee balled his hat in his hands.  He was nervous.  Not because the Sergeant wanted to see him, but because of what he was planning to tell the Sergeant.  Lee planned to tell a lie, several lies, a lot of lies.  Big juicy meaty lies that fell just short of being fables. 

Lee hadn’t openly and knowingly lied since he was in the fifth grade.  It was right before Christmas.  Jeongguk had been doing karate kicks in the house and accidently kicked over his grandmother’s Urn full of ashes.  As soon as his Grandma Myeong spilled all over the hardwood floors, he burst into tears.  He raced into Lee’s room to beg him for help.  Lee hurried into the bedroom to see what Jeongguk had done.   The moment he knelt down to clean up the mess, his mother returned from the market.  She walked into the bedroom and screamed.   She was horrified to see thick lumps of her mother’s cremated bones spilled all over the floor.  She immediately demanded to know who had done such a thing.  Jeongguk was only in the first grade.  He was so tiny, with those big doe eyes.  There was no way that Lee could allow him to take the blame.  So Lee lied to protect his little brother. He told his mother that he was the one who had knocked over the ashes, even though he knew he would be punished.  Fast forward twenty-eight years and Lee was once again prepared to lie on his brother’s behalf. 

Sweat trickled along the ridges of his forehead as he waited for Sergeant Majuk to call him back to his office.  The entire precinct was filled with cloudy grey smoke that penetrated the walls and embedded into the fabric of the chairs.  It felt like a foggy cloudy day where rain would burst through the clouds at any moment, except they were inside.  Lee wondered how his brother had been able to stand it.  Jeongguk absolutely hated cigarette smoke. 

Lee coughed every few minutes, not because of the smoke, but more because of nerves.  Coughing was a way to relieve some of the tension in his chest.  He looked down at his hat and realized that it was bent completely out of shape as it rested within his closed fists.  He quickly unwrinkled it and placed it on the empty seat next to him. 

Lee sat in the front lobby in the same area where many of the perps were waiting to be processed.  He felt uncomfortable as they all glared at his Priest collar.  He wondered what they were thinking, what crime they had committed and why they had been arrested.  He was almost 99% certain that nothing they had done even began to touch the seedy dealings of his brother.  Even though it shouldn’t have, the thought made Lee chuckle.  Life was certainly full of surprises. 

Another five minutes passed before a rotund gentleman about 180 centimeters tall, with dark grey hair, and small heavily hooded eyes, found his way to the front lobby.  He looked around the room before calling out, “Uh Jeon Lee?”

Lee stood, “Here.  I mean, I’m him.”

Sergeant Majuk’s eyes opened with surprise.  “You’re a-a-a...,”

“...a Priest.  Yes.”  Jeon Lee was fully decked out in his Priest attire.  He even had a large gold Crucifix hanging around his neck to help identify team God. 

“Jeon never told me that he had a brother who was a Priest.”

“I’m sure there are quite a few things that my brother never told you.  Shall we?”  Lee was not interested in delaying any further.  He had practiced his lies over and over again and he needed to get them out before he stumbled and forgot the finer points.  He had no time for chit-chat.

“Yeah, follow me.”

The smoke that lingered in the lobby was nothing compared to the smoke that filled the main office space where all of the detectives sat.  It truly was a health hazard.  Lee removed his handkerchief and pressed it against his lips in a losing effort to filter out some of the grey haze that crawled down his throat. 

“How did my brother deal with all of this smoke?”

Sergeant Majuk turned with a smile, “He didn’t. He was rarely ever relegated to the office.  Detective Jeon was mostly a field officer.  Heavy surveillance, long hours of wiretap analysis, that kind of stuff.  When he was stuck in the office, he was miserable.”  The Sergeant shared what seemed to be a fond memory of Lee’s brother.

They continued to weave their way through rows and rows of wooden desks.  The Seoul police department was quite large and the detective unit seemed to be growing exponentially.  There were at least another 100 officers more than when Jeongguk was originally hired.  They reached Majuk’s office and he promptly closed the door. 

Out of what Lee assumed was basic courtesy, Majuk opened the window and turned on an oscillating fan.  As the fan blades whizzed around, it filled the room with a subdued hum that Lee and the Sergeant had to raise their voices to speak over.

Lee jumped right in, “I must say officer.  I was surprised to receive a message that you wanted to meet with me.  I called you every week for three months about my brother’s case.  None of your officers seemed very interested in solving it or even talking to me to give me updates.  So please tell me, what prompted you to finally agree to meet with me after all of these months?”  Lee was firm.

The Sergeant ran his fingers through his grey hair, “Where do I even fucking begin?” Majuk sighed.

“How about the fucking beginning?”

“Sir?  Your language!” Majuk quipped.

“Respectfully Sergeant.  I called this office every day for three fucking months.  Finally, about one month ago, I just gave up.  Not once, not once did you have the decency to return my phone call, or send me a note or even give me the respect of asking how he was doing.  You never even visited him in the hospital but now you want to talk to me?  You have five fucking minutes to get to it or else I’m walking out of that door.” Lee did not mean to unleash such anger, but he was beyond frustrated about how he had been treated when he reached out for help.

“Father, Reverend, Priest-bro, Holy one, whatever your official title is...it’s not what you think.  Initial reports were that your brother was dead.  In fact, it wasn’t until we received your phone call that we knew that he was still alive.  Your Priest-enship, your brother was working on a case that was so sensitive that my entire department was sworn to secrecy.  I made the call and commanded that my team not reach out to you.  We were being watched.”

“Watched?  By who?  Who the fuck was watching you?  You’re the police, you’re supposed to watch everyone else.”

“The Blue House and possibly others.  For Jeongguk’s safety, we felt it best for the world to think he was dead until we had a chance to solve the case.  We had to work through the suspect list quietly, without bringing a lot of attention to this case.  Talking with you would have been too suspicious.  There are some very heavy hitters involved in this situation.  In fact, on several occasions we were told to just drop the investigation...some of us were even threatened.  So before you come in here ready to rip my head off, please listen to what I have to say.  And for the record...the word fuck is not in the bible!”  Sergeant Majuk had to get one wise crack in before proceeding. 

“My apologies.  This has been a very tense time for me.  Please continue.”  Lee apologized, but he didn’t mean it.  No matter how sensitive the case was, someone could have and should have called him back.  Someone from the department could have and should have visited Jeongguk at least once.  Someone could have and should have said at least one kind fucking word for the man who had been attacked in the line of duty.  The Sergeant was covering for just plain old rude behavior and Lee was having none of it.

Majuk sat back in his chair.  It squeaked so loudly under his excessive weight, that Lee had to cover his ears.  The noise was grating and distracting.  “Sorry, we need to oil that wheel I guess.”  He leaned forward and sat up straight so that the chair would stop complaining.  “So listen your Holiness, Jeon was embedded with a crew known as the South Street Kkangpae.  Yeah you heard me right, mafia.  He had been working a racketeering case against the leader, Park Jimin and his brother Park Xio.  For three years he had brought us every lead, every tip, every move made by Park.  He befriend Park, you know, pretended to be on his side.  Well the word on the street is that Park found out that your brother was a cop.  He put a hit out on him and ambushed him in his apartment.  The rest...you already know.”

Lee rolled his eyes.  He honestly couldn’t believe how stupid the Sergeant was.  “I see.  And where did you get this information?”

“A very credible source straight from the top; Ji Huyoung, the Minister of Veteran’s Affairs.”

“I see.  So the Minister believes that Park Jimin was behind my brother’s attack?”

“Yes and we agree with his assessment.”

“What proof do you have?”  Lee pressed.

“The word of a high ranking government official should be proof enough.  This guy works for the President as part of the legislative body.”

“Yes but if that official is compromised then he is not so reliable, correct?,”  Lee said daringly.  It was time to spin the truth a little. He was well practiced, he felt confident. 

“Compromised?”

“Look into it.  According to Jeongguk, the Minister has tremendous gambling debts.  He’s being blackmailed to say things - many things that are meant to point the finger at Park Jimin.  Park Jimin was not involved in my brother’s attack.  In reality, my brother’s attacker was Jung Sun-dook.  Jung had discovered that my brother was close to making an arrest - not an arrest of Park - but an arrest of Jung and many in his crew.  Jung ordered the execution of my brother.”

“What?  That is not what the Minister told us in his official report.  How do you know this?”

“If you had made even the smallest effort to call me back, I would have been able to share the notes from my brother’s investigation.”  Lee reached inside of his suit pocket and pulled three small journals free.  He handed them to the Sergeant.  “When my brother was found, he had these three journals on his person.  In his own pen, he outlined all of the evidence he had collected on Jung Sun-dook.  Furthermore, just before he lost consciousness, he clearly identified his shooter as Jung himself.  This is his own personal account in his own writing, covered in his own blood.  He scribbled these notes from the back of a trunk, while his body was full of bullets.  These journals will stand up in any court.  But again, you didn’t know this information Sergeant because you never called me back.  Now you look like a fool spouting off nonsense about Park Jimin being behind the attack.  I do hope you never shared this silly conclusion with your superiors,”  Lee said tersely. 

Sergeant Majuk picked up the journals and flipped through them.  He immediately recognized Jeongguk’s unique style of meticulous handwriting.  “This is Jeon’s handwriting.  I’d recognize it anywhere.”

“Yes.  It is.  And if you will continue into the third journal, you’ll see that he concluded his investigation into Park Jimin as well as his brother Xio.  The Parks were never the problem here Sergeant.  All of the illegal dealings were done by the Ging Street Kkangpae, not Park or his family.  My brother was attacked because Jung felt he was getting too close to the truth.”

“This looks legit.  There’s dates.  He’s even documented where we can find the evidence.  Too bad Jung and most of his crew are dead.  This would have been everything we needed to make an arrest and clear Park.” 

Lee took a deep breath.  Only he knew that Jeongguk had spent the last two weeks during his physical therapy sessions, fabricating all of the information in the three journals.  He even cut himself a few times with a pin so that he could spread a little blood on the journals and make them more believable.  All of the information about Jung was correct, but everything about Jimin and Xio had been conveniently altered to remove culpability.  Although it pained Jeongguk to lie once more to cover Xio’s crimes, he took comfort in knowing that it would be the last time.  It would also finally, once and for all, exonerate the Parks.  Lastly, with a little help from Kosuke, he also provided very detailed information about Minister Ji and his illegal activities. There was also plentiful information on where to find the evidence.      

The Sergeant pondered, “But he and I spoke almost every day.  Why did he never tell me that Park was no longer a suspect.  That doesn’t make sense.”

“Because he wanted to bring you the real suspect.  Otherwise you would have never accepted what he was trying to tell you.  Per my brother’s words, you had a vendetta against Park and you were not going to believe he was innocent until and unless he could bring the real culprits to you.  He was close to doing that.  Another two or three days and he would have made the arrest of Jung.  But Jung and his crew stopped him before that happened.”

“How do you think they knew he was about to take them down?”

“They bugged his apartment. I found a miniature listening device while cleaning,”  Lee nodded.  His eyes bulged a bit.  He didn’t expect the question.  The story about the bug was an awful lie but it seemed passable.  Besides, with Jung and his crew dead, there was no one to refute his story.

“Oh.  Ok.  Well, we’ll need the device for evidence.  Please turn it over when you can.”

“Sure thing.”  Lee made a mental note to contact Kosuke for help finding a miniature listening device.

“Your Priestliness, if you knew all of this, why did you keep calling?  You already knew the attacker.”

Lee took a deep breath.  This was the lie that he had practiced the most, “I didn’t know all of this.  I only found this out about one month ago.  Once my brother passed away the...,”

“What?”

“What?”

“Detective Jeon is dead?  He-he didn’t make it?”  Majuk’s eyes filled with tears.  Despite his chilly attitude towards Lee, he clearly cared for Jeongguk.

“No, no he didn’t.”  Lee looked straight into the Sergeant’s eyes and made the claim.  “Maybe if you had just once returned my phone call...this would not have come as such a shock to you.”

The Sergeant wiped his tears, “I’m – very sorry for your loss.  He was a great kid.  A great cop.  Honest, worked his ass off to bring Park down.”

Lee stifled a laugh, “Yeah, ok.  Absolutely.”  It was an odd response but it was the best Lee could do.  That was not a lie he had practiced.  “As I was saying...once Jeongguk passed away, the hospital returned the clothes that he was wearing on the day of his attack.  It was not until I looked through the pockets that I found these journals.  I tried to call you to turn them in but...well you know the drill.”

“No one returned your call,”  the Sergeant said with regret.

“Yeah.  Once I had this information, this confession from my brother, I didn’t need anything else.  The murderers were dead.  Park was dead.  There was no need for me to continue down this path.  I had to turn the page so that I could start healing. And that’s where we are today,”  Lee said calmly.  He took a deep breath and wiped his forehead.  He was a terrible liar but he had given an award winning performance.

“May I keep these?  I’ll have to validate all of this information.”

“Yes, you may keep them.  I believe he wrote them for you.  In his last act of bravery he chose to clear Park’s name and point you to the real criminals.  With a shit load of evidence on the Minister as an added bonus.  I do believe that once you expose a member of the President’s counsel as being a corrupt bastard, promotions will be reigned down upon you, far more than what Park or Jung could have brought you.” Lee said strategically.  He appealed to the Sergeant’s ego and thirst for recognition.

“Wow.  Can’t believe I had this so wrong.  You didn’t have to bring this evidence in, but you did.  So Thank you, your God-enship.”

“You really should just call me Lee.”

Things had not been easy for Lee, especially as he grappled with the truth of his brother’s lifestyle.  But when Jeongguk finally came out of his coma, suddenly none of it seemed to matter anymore.  Yes, Jeongguk had killed a man.  And Lee was infinitely disturbed by the fact.  But in news of the weird and whacky, Jeongguk had no memory of it, which made for the most challenging moral dilemma to ever face man.  How could he force his little brother to atone for a sin that he had no memory or knowledge of committing?  It was quite the conundrum.  God had a great sense of humor.     

Lee and his brother had spoken at length about the things that Lee had read in Jeongguk’s diary.  Tears were shed and truths were faced as Jeongguk realized that his brother knew things that he was only meant to learn after Jeongguk’s death.  Never was it his intention to traumatize his brother and then have to face him afterwards.  As much as they both hated to admit it, things changed between them; not so much from Lee’s side, but more from Jeongguk as he cowered in shame from the horrible acts that he’d done. 

Jeongguk took time during his rehab to read through all of his journals.  Considering the slippage in his memory, he needed them to supplement his memory restoration.  There were precious facts within those journals and had he not kept record of them, those facts would have been lost forever.  His journals helped restore his old life. 

But in the end, he and Lee jointly decided that all of Jeongguk’s journals needed to be destroyed.  The journals were too dangerous to keep around.  If anyone had found them, the deaths of Jung’s clan and Xio and countless acts of police impropriety would have been revealed.  He had been successful with hiding them for years, but considering that his life was about to be uprooted, he no longer felt safe having them around.  As Jeongguk stood by and watched, Lee burned all of Jeongguk’s journals in the fireplace.  Years and years of his memories and meticulous record keeping, went up in flames.  It was a tough pill to swallow and Jeongguk grieved over them as if they were his children.

As an interesting side note, Jeongguk still had no memory of killing Xio even after reading the recount.  There were large gaps in his recollection and that particular tidbit had been completely obliterated.  Chu-lun suggested that it may have been his brain’s way of protecting him from a memory that was too painful.  Although, not remembering the act didn’t make the act disappear.  Jeongguk had confessed to it all, right there in his own handwriting.  The burden remained.  But, it was much less painful for Jeongguk to process without the explicit memory of watching the life drain from Xio’s eyes.

Through a series of very tough choices, counsel, prayer and loud ass Kumo, Lee decided to leave the Priesthood.  He was not turning his back on God, but rather, going about his business of outreach in a slightly different manner. 

Kumo wanted to continue Jimin’s tradition of Christmas for Guryong.  However, she decided to expand it to a year round event that helped the villagers get access to good education, clothes, and meals.  She also wanted to do more work with the children of the village to keep them from being taken advantage of  like she was when she was young.  So she started a new charity organization that was sponsored by Posco.  Lee was hired as the leader and director.  He received a steady salary, recognition for his work, and a fulfilling career that allowed him to pursue his passion of guiding others.  He still held God as well as his religious teachings close to his heart and shared them with anyone who was willing to listen.  He preached at Sunday school and even served as the Officiant at weddings.  But officially, he was off of God’s payroll.

Lee straightened his tie.  He turned sideways to admire his profile in the mirror and then faced forward.  Then he turned the other way to check his other profile.  Then he faced forward again. 

“I look the same from every angle.  I guess I should just accept it.”  He grumbled to himself.  He was nervous. 

Lee was scheduled to pick up Chu-lun within the hour, but he was already dressed and ready to go.  The suit that he was wearing was one of many that Jeongguk had given him.  Jeongguk had also signed over his apartment and a healthy amount of cash for Lee to live on.  As he started his life with Jimin in America, Jeongguk made certain that Lee was well taken care of.  With Jimin’s “death”, Jeongguk had technically inherited all of Jimin’s wealth.  But in reality, all of Jimin’s funds had just been transferred out of Korean banks.  Still, Jeongguk had plenty of money of his own that he was able to share with his caring brother.  Despite the lavish gifts and property and loads of cash, Jeongguk was just as humble as the day he and Jimin first met.  He stashed most of his cash in the bank, rarely kept any of the suits and never kept any of the jewelry.  Jeongguk was a plain and simple man who had inadvertently amassed a fortune just because he didn’t care about material things.  And he was more than willing to share it with Lee.

Lee arrived at Dr. Chu-lun’s tiny apartment.  He nervously twisted the bouquet of flowers in his hand as he waited for her to open the door. 

As soon as she saw the flowers, she smiled and leaned forward to kiss him.  Lee was not an experienced kisser, but he had improved a lot over the few months that he and Chu-lun had been practicing. 

“You look beautiful.  Are you ready to go?   The Elvis movie starts in 15 minutes.  There are several playing today and tomorrow though, so if we’re late, we’ll have another chance to see it,”  he said politely.  He didn’t want to appear as if he were rushing Chu-lun.

The doctor reached forward and kissed him again. “You’re so incredibly handsome.  I enjoy you very much, I hope you know that.”

Lee turned every shade of red on the spectrum.  His eyes swept the ground as he tried to respond without sounding like a stuttering fool, “I feel the same.  But...,” he was so nervous, “Dr. Chu-lun, I hope that you can go slowly with me.  I’m not ready to take that step.  I’m a virgin and...,”

Chu-lun placed her finger over his lips.  “We can do as much or as little as you feel comfortable with.  I’m here solely to enjoy your company, not take your flower.  I know that me and Kumo teased you, but it was just a joke.  I would never push you into something that you weren’t ready for.  You’ll know when you’re ready.  And, if it happens, great.  If not, it won’t change anything.”  She leaned forward and kissed him again, but this time it was much deeper and more passionate.  She placed her arms over his shoulders and pulled him close against her body. 

Lee could feel all of her curves and warmth.  It was a feeling that he’d never had before.  All of their days of innocent pecks on the cheek and holding hands, never felt like this.  They kissed for many minutes until he began to feel something strange happening in his pants.  He tried to ignore it but it became more and more persistent until Chu-lun finally felt it too.  Their bodies were pressed so hard against each other that he couldn’t hide his “excitement”.  He couldn’t stop kissing her.  He couldn’t step away from the curvy softness of her breasts.  She felt – good – great – sinful.

Chu-lun leaned into Lee’s hard cock.  She smiled and then adjusted her statement, “Now...if you’re ready to do a little practicing, that’s fine with me too.”

Lee stared into her eyes with his mouth agape, “I-I-I think I want to do a little practicing.”

Chu-lun pulled him into the apartment and locked the door.  They never made it to the Elvis movie.

May 17th, 1967 – Key West Florida

The bungalow where Jimin and Jeongguk lived as husbands was quaint, but there was plenty of space for the two of them.  It wasn’t the same as the palatial penthouse, but it was all they needed as they worked to define their new normal.  Much was thrown at their relationship right from the beginning.  They had been apart for months and months.  They had been uprooted and forced into a new country where they barely knew the language.  Jeongguk was still recovering and had significant gaps in his memory.  They were, in some aspects, forced to get to know each other all over again.  They were comfortable in their new country but they had to learn to be comfortable with each other. 

Jimin did his best not to hover over Jeongguk.  He tried to give him space and take things slow.  But the miracle of having his lover back in his life made him inexplicably – clingy.  Not a second passed where he didn’t want to breathe him,  hold him, feed him, hug him, kiss him, smell him, love him with unruly passion.  But the doctors had warned him that there was a such thing as “too much”.  They warned about overwhelming him with expectations or pushing him too fast to return to normal. So Jimin was patient.  He followed their instructions to the letter and tried to give Jeongguk space to find his own way.

Jeongguk’s doctors visited with him a couple times per week as he continued to regain his strength.  Although, with Jimin by his side, he made very fast progress.  His memory continued to improve but there were fundamentals that he could not corral.  He had trouble remembering how to do basic functions such as tying his shoe, or shaving.  It’s not that he had lost the ability, it was just a loss of muscle memory where he had to be trained to do it again. Once he received the instruction, his instincts would take over and he could conquer the practice again. 

The problem was, there was no list of specific items that he had forgotten how to do.  They just popped up suddenly as he attempted to live his day to day life.  The lapses bothered Jeongguk tremendously and he felt like a burden to Jimin.  But Jimin was so jubilant to have him back in his life that he never once felt burdened by helping Jeongguk recover.  In fact, helping him recover was the joy of his life.  Every day he looked forward to helping Jeongguk conquer something new.  More and more of the man that he remembered was coming back to him. 

Jimin watched protectively as Jeongguk shaved himself for the first time since being retrained on how to do it.  He was nervous that Jeongguk might cut himself, but his stallion’s hand was as sturdy as ever.  Until, he suddenly stopped. 

He looked at Jimin with a straight smile as he pressed his lips together.  “Min.  I remember something.”  Jeongguk inexplicably pulled open the waist band of his pajama pants and looked at his nuts.

“What do you remember?”  Jimin kindly wiped away the excess shaving cream from Jeongguk’s face as he listened to his husband’s newly discovered memory.

“You shaved my balls once.”

Jimin burst into laughter.  “Yeah, I did.  I was just playing around though.  Remember, I wanted to suck your nuts, but I didn’t want a mouth full of furballs.”

Jeongguk laughed so hard that he dropped his razer in the sink.  “That sounds like a problem only you would have.  I’m the type to love it all – furballs and everything.”

“Yes - you are.”  Jimin agreed.  He knew from experience that his former detective was a bit freaky when it came to nut sucking.  “You’re so naughty.  Why are you so naughty?”  Jimin leaned in to give his husband a kiss, but instead he was met with a large dollop of shaving cream that he had missed.  It went up his nose and caused his nostril to burn. 

Jeongguk laughed.  “You’re so perfect.  I love you, don’t I?”

“You do.  You love me sooooo much that you fought 15 bullet wounds, a coma, and Kumo just to get back to me.  That’s a lot of love, my love.”

As the days ticked by, Jimin methodically, but carefully fed Jeongguk’s unrelenting quest for lost memories.  Jeongguk was particularly interested in all of the things that had occurred while he was in a coma for three long months.  Where Jimin couldn’t fill in the gaps, Kumo and Lee stepped in with long distance conversations that sometimes lasted for hours.  It was all enlightening for Jeongguk and definitely scratched his itch as he tried to returned to normal. 

But from Jimin’s perspective, there were still many dark secrets that he was withholding from his husband.  It wasn’t that Jimin was afraid to tell him, it was just that he was ashamed.  So very ashamed.  Even he didn’t fully understand himself what had driven him to such a psychopathic state the night of the killings.  Jimin toyed with the idea of keeping his secrets from his husband forever.  But his conscious wouldn’t allow it.  If felt like a betrayal of trust to not be fully honest with him.  Jeongguk deserved to know about Jimin’s night of terror.

The beach was a very dark place at night with no street lights or illuminated buildings.  And when there was no moon, it was especially dank, leaving nothing but cloudy stillness in the atmosphere.  To overcome the blanket of darkness, Jeongguk installed night lights in every room inside of the small bungalow.  The lights were so bright that, at times, Jimin had trouble sleeping.  As he looked around the room at all of the nightlights glowing their brightest glow, Jimin couldn’t help but smile.  Jeongguk’s way of showing love was subtle but deeply intense.

Jimin lay in the bed, propped on his side, watching his husband sleep.  He softly brushed the stray hairs from Jeongguk’s forehead as the younger slumbered in peaceful silence.  Staring at Jeongguk as he slept was a new phenomenon born of the days, weeks, months when Jimin thought he was dead.  Every night as his husband slept, he took ten minutes to gaze at him, breathe him in and thank God for bringing him back.  Never again would he take for granted the love or the man that was Jeon Jeongguk.  

But there was another reason that Jimin wasn’t sleeping.  The time had come to make his confessions.  He worried that with Jeongguk’s memory coming back and Kumo and Kosuke back in his life, that Jeongguk might accidently hear Jimin’s truth from someone else.  It was time to tell him, but night after night he lay awake trying to determine how.  What was the best way?  When was the best time? 

Suddenly Jeongguk spoke to him, “I feel like 90% of my memory is back.  And do you know what I specifically remember?”

“I didn’t wake you did I?  Why are you awake?”

“Because you’re awake.”

“Oh, sorry.  Well, since you’re up, tell me about your memory.  What is it?”  Jimin cuddled next to him, smiling like a schoolboy.

“I remember that when you can’t sleep, it’s because something is deeply troubling you.  You have to get this off of your chest, whatever it is, or your insomnia will continue.  I’ve always been here to carry your burdens, like the partners we are.  I will carry my load, my share of your worries so that you aren’t the only one who has to deal with them.  This has gone on for a couple of weeks now.  It’s time to tell me.  Whatever it is, we’ll work through it,”  Jeongguk said.

Jimin appreciated at that moment that Jeongguk was not just his physical partner.  He was also his spirit animal, his other half, his yin to his yang.  Losing Jeongguk to death had killed part of Jimin.  But now that Jeongguk was back, that part of Jimin was also alive again.  It was a phenomenon that really needed to be studied.  The perfect union.

“I am you.”

“And you are me.”  Jeongguk held Jimin’s hands and kissed them.  “Now spill.”

“Do you remember what happened the night that Jung and his men took you?”

“No, not really.  Bits and pieces maybe.  I was writing in my journal, preparing for my road trip to visit my brother.  There was a knock at the door.  I wasn’t expecting anyone.  I opened the door and then I was immediately stuck in the neck with something sharp.  I now know it was a needle full of drugs.  I think I tried to run down the hall for help, but...I guess I passed out and they captured me.  That’s all I remember.”

“What I’m going to tell you is very disturbing.  I know that Kumo has told you some of this, but I want you to hear it from me.”  Jimin sat up.  It was time to confess.  “They hog tied you and threw you in the trunk like an animal.  And then they opened fire on you, knowing that you had been drugged and you couldn’t defend yourself.  And they left you for dead.  There were over 150 bullets in that fucking car.  They tried to execute you.  And you were an innocent, both you and Kumo.  If they had come after me, that would have been one thing.  That was part of the code, it was to be expected.  I was ready.  I had been ready for months.  But I never in a million years thought they would go after you.  Xio told Jung about our relationship in an anonymous letter.  He sent him a picture of you and I together and told them that you were very special to me.  Xio purposefully made you a target, even after everything you’d done for him.    

Anyway, Jung used that information and went after you to get to me.  He wanted Xio. I told him that Xio was dead, but he didn’t believe me.  So after he had you, he was greedy and decided to also take Kumo.  Going after Kumo was a very serious offense in the mob world.  Spouses and children are always supposed to be off limits in our petty gang wars.  But Jung had no morals or ethics.  He was so distraught about his grandson that...,”  Jimin couldn’t continue. 

“What did you do?”  Jeongguk cut straight to it.  “I know that Jung is dead, but I just assumed it was an accident of some kind. Or possibly some beef with another rival.  But...,”  Jeongguk released Jimin’s hands. “What did you do?”

Jimin looked down into his empty hands.  He couldn’t look into Jeongguk’s eyes.  The sparkle from the night lights was so bright. The man looked so innocent and beautiful.  He didn’t want to say it, but he had to.  “I lost – my humanity.” 

“Oh Min.” Jeongguk shook his head and gave Jimin a very stern glare.  “Not over me?  Please tell me it wasn’t because of me.”

“You don’t understand.  I don’t even understand.  I died inside when you were gone.  I had never felt so much darkness and filth in my soul in my entire life.  It was like the moment that I killed my mother. All of the blackness flooded my veins, but ten times worse.  I felt like I was avenging my little brother all over again.  THEY HAD TO DIE!  THEY SHOT YOU DOWN LIKE AN ANIMAL!  THEY HAD TO DIE!”  Jimin screamed.

“BUT I DIDN’T DIE!  YOU KILLED THEM FOR NOTHING.  Because this is what happens when you lose your humanity; when you look everyplace else for answers instead of your own heart.  When you can’t see right from wrong.  THIS, THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS.  What they did to me and Kumo was terrible, demonic. But karma would have eventually come back to bite them.  But you took this into your own hands, even after you promised me that you were out of that life for good.  Jimin what have you done? You’re the one who told me how devastating it was to the soul to have to carry the burden of murder.  But you did it anyway?”

“It wasn’t me.  I don’t know who that man was.  I went dark inside.”

“How many?”

“Does it matter?”

“Every life matters.  How many?”

“Ten.”

“Oh God,”  Jeongguk shifted his body away from Jimin as if he couldn’t stand his touch. 

Jimin was hurt.  The gesture felt reductive, malevolent.  He lashed out, “You came to me...after what happened to Xio, you came to me and you confessed...,”

“That was different!”

“How?”

“What happened with Xio was an accident?”

 

Jimin snapped.  Finally after months, the frustration over losing his brother bubbled up, “WAS IT?  WAS IT REALLY A FUCKING ACCIDENT?”  Jimin said angrily.  “YOU TOOK MY ONLY BLOOD RELATIVE AWAY FROM ME.  YOU KNOW WHAT THE MAFIA CODE OF VENGEANCE SHOULD HAVE BEEN FOR YOU.  BUT I DIDN’T EVEN GIVE IT A SECOND THOUGHT.  I NEVER EVEN CONSIDERED IT BECAUSE I LOVE YOU MORE THAN THE AIR I BREATHE.  YOU CAME TO ME AND SULKED LIKE A BABY AND BEGGED ME TO KILL YOU BECAUSE OF YOUR OWN FUCKING GUILT.”  Jimin jumped out of the bed.  He calmed himself, that was never a good sign. “Tell me Kookie,”  Jimin repeated himself, “was it really an accident or did you secretly just want to do all of us a favor and rid the world of that piece of shit?  Ask yourself that question Jeongguk. Before you act all righteous with me, ask yourself what you were feeling in your heart when you took his life.  Because I guarantee you it was the same thing I was feeling – THIS FUCKING TOXIC LOVE THAT WE HAVE FOR EACH OTHER!  It’s not sane.  It drives us to do maddening things.  You can’t get all self-righteous with me when you did the same fucking thing for the exact same fucking reason!”

Jeongguk jumped out of the bed.  He pulled on a sweatshirt and a pair of sweatpants and bolted from the bedroom.

“Where are you going?  WHERE ARE YOU GOING?” Jimin screamed after him.

“To get some air!”  Jeongguk disappeared.

Jimin paced around the bedroom.  He clenched his fists and then unclenched them.  He pounded his head with his palms as he took short shallow, panic filled breaths.  Once again he kneaded his chest, as fatalistic thoughts swam through his mind. What if Jeongguk couldn’t forgive him?  Jimin had promised Jeongguk that he would never cross that line, but he had indeed crossed that line.  What was he going to do?  He had already lost his Kookie for four long months, he couldn’t lose him again.  He paced back and forth, back and forth, back and forth and back again.  What was he going to do?  How was he going to make Jeongguk forgive him? 

He wanted to run after him, but he remembered what the doctor said about giving him space to find his own way.  It was a risk that he didn’t know if he had the guts to take.  But Jeongguk needed to find his own way.  He had to deal with the reality of what they had both done. 

For Jeongguk, it was difficult to see the similarities between their two fallacies because Jeongguk’s loss of memory had separated him from the emotional frailty he was feeling when he went after Xio.  That was one of the reasons that he couldn’t reconcile what Jimin had done.  He had lost his point of reference.  Jimin began to pace again.  He paced back and forth, back and forth, back and forth and back...,“Oh!”  He startled. 

Jeongguk had suddenly returned and was standing behind him. “I remember something...about the night I killed Xio.”  He was pale and his eyes were focused on the ground.  His thoughts swam around his head, Jimin could almost see them moving about.  Something was stirring in his husband’s beautiful mind.  He looked as if he were on the verge of solving a riddle.  Jimin didn’t speak.  Jeongguk’s mood was strange, so he chose to remain silent. 

“You’re right Min.  It wasn’t an accident”

“Baby?  Baby what?”  Jimin stepped a few centimeters closer.

“He threatened to tell you something.  A secret that I never knew anyone else knew.  I had an inappropriate relationship with one of the guys on your dad’s crew when I was a teenager.”

“What?” 

“I didn’t want him to tell you that.  But that wasn’t enough to drive me over the edge, I just wanted to talk him out of it.  But - then he started on about how he was going to kill you and how he was going to make sure that you were violated and tortured in prison...it was too much.  I just snapped.  It was no longer about me, it was about you.  I didn’t want him to hurt you.  I knew I was killing him but I refused to let go.  I was so full of rage that by the time I calmed down, it was too late.  If I could have just stopped a few seconds sooner, he would have lived but...I couldn’t stop.  I wanted to see the life drain out of him for all of the trouble he had caused you.  That was the reason that I wanted to die.  That was the reason that I wanted you to kill me... because it wasn’t an accident.  By the time I got back to your penthouse, I knew.  I knew that what I had done was out of love for you and that made it even more sickening.”  Jeongguk fell on the edge of the bed. 

Jimin took a deep breath.  Finally Jeongguk had admitted it.

“Where do we go from here?  How do we forgive each other?”

“Is there such a thing?  This is absolutely horrific.” Jeongguk shook his head.

Jimin didn’t know how to address that.  Anything he said would have seemed like he was minimizing a very serious problem.  “Do we go to therapy?  I mean how do we learn to not kill people in the name of love?  I’m sure some of the better therapists have that topic on their menu.”

“Not the time,” Jeongguk said quickly and seriously. 

“Yep, understood.  Not the time.  Thanks for setting those boundaries,”  Jimin quickly agreed.  “Are we ok?”

“NO!”  Jeongguk quipped.  “We’re not ok.  That’s another topic that needs to be on the menu.  How to be ok with notbeing ok.”

Jimin couldn’t tell if he was joking or not, but it didn’t seem like it.

Jeongguk disappeared and then reappeared again.  He removed all of the clothing that he had dawned in the midst of his tantrum and crawled back into the bed.

“Come here, please.  I have something to show you.”  Jeongguk looked on imploringly.

Jimin sat on the edge of the bed, not fully committed to lying next to his husband again.  Since Jimin would not come to him, he went to Jimin.  Jeongguk repositioned and sat on the edge of the bed next to him.  He placed a tattered, folded piece of paper into Jimin’s hand.

“What is this?”

“A page from my journal.  Read it please?”

Jimin looked up with confusion, “I thought you destroyed all of your journals?”

“I did.  But there were certain pages that I ripped out and kept.  Certain passages that were deeply important to me. Revelations...about our love.”

“Our love?”

“Our love is not toxic Min - just our circumstances are,”  Jeongguk explained.  Read it please.”

Jimin read through the neatly organized paragraphs.  He looked up at Jeongguk at the conclusion of the last word, “Redemption?  Our road to redemption?”

“You spoke about it so passionately on the night that I killed Xio.  You were trying to instill hope in me and remind me that even though things looked bleak, we had been given another chance.  I wrote about it at length in my journal because it was life changing.  I dreamed of the day when we could finally put the past behind us and live our lives the right way.  That night,  we promised each other that we would start anew, and take a different path.  We’ve been given this chance and we can’t fuck it up.”  Jeongguk smiled.  “I’m so sorry for snapping at you and saying the things that I said.  Understand that – it hurt to see you go down that path and do those horrible things.  It scared me.  It made me wonder who was the real Park Jimin.”

Jimin dropped to his knees in front of Jeongguk, “I’m the real Park Jimin.  ME.  The man in front of you.  The man who loves children and likes to play Santa.  The man who loves numbers, and strategy and finance.  The man who hates shootouts and feels they’re a waste of bullets.  Me.  I’m right here.  I told you...what happened that night was...,”

“A temporary loss of humanity...,”

“...the loss of you,”  Jimin interrupted.

“How many times have I told you?  You can’t make me be responsible for your happiness.  You have to learn to be happy with or without me.  You can’t turn back into that person because of your addiction to me.”

“Addiction.  That’s such an ugly word.  What we have is called love.”

“You love me, there is no doubt.  And I love you.  But love should birth beauty not death.  There is something else mixed in with our love and passion – addiction to each other.”

Jimin felt that Jeongguk’s words were profound, even though he didn’t like hearing them.  He took a moment to try to plead his case,  “My entire exile was predicated on me going insane because of what happened.  Kosuke forced me here alone to learn to survive on my own, without you, without Kumo, without my company, without Xio.  It was just me and I had to figure out who I was and what happiness was.  I had to figure out how to heal and how to break my reliance on you.  And I did.  Kookie, I could hear your words every day, in every wind,  telling me to be strong, and find my way.  I’ll never go back to that place.  You have to believe me.”

Jeongguk agreed, “I do believe you.  But I have to forgive you for the things you did out of intense pain and you have to forgive me for the things done out of intense fear.  I pray that those sides of us are buried forever.  We have to start anew.”

Jimin questioned, “Maybe there was a purpose in all of this suffering?”

“I guess only time will tell. I’m sorry Min, for what I said.”

“I’m sorry too.  Seems like we were never this spicy before the accident.  We’ve got a lot of work ahead of us if we are ever going to heal.”

“I’m willing to do it.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

May 30th, 1967 – Weeks after Jimin and Jeongguk were reunited...

Jimin sat comfortably in the private booth at Nobu Japanese restaurant.  Despite being a newly minted “beach bum” Jimin had not lost his modish fashion sense, especially for all things opulent.  His taste for high priced suits and even higher priced shoes hadn’t waned.  This time his tan tweed suit came in three pieces with a Herringbone tailored collard vest beneath his suit jacket. A heavy solid gold watch adorned his left wrist, while his signature gold bracelet hung from his right.  Stretched in a relaxed layer over his tie, lay his delicate marriage medallion.  No more did he hide it.  In fact, every chance he got, he displayed it proudly for everyone to see.    

Although his hair had faded several shades lighter from the resplendency of the Florida sun, its naturally dark hue still stood out from the flurry of blondes, reds, and browns that populated the streets of America.   With his slightly tanned face, softened by the auspices of love, he perused Nobu’s menu.

Nobu restaurant was in the heart of the booming financial district of Manhattan.  It was a swanky place that reminded him a bit of his father's restaurant in Korea. The entire placed was adorned in red velvet with gold plated tables and chairs.  Even the flat ware was gold.  The stout water glasses and elegant wine glasses with the thin stems were all made of delicate crystal.  And pure white linen napkins sat atop the bone China plates at every seat.  The place was fancy indeed.  Kosuke had chosen the place and offered to pay.  Jimin smiled – he was going to make sure that his mentor left with quite a hefty bill.

It was his first time in New York and he marveled at the massive steel construction that was being erected all around him.  From his seat on the first floor, near the window, he had a fantastic view of the city and it’s ever evolving sky line. He was only blocks away from the New York Stock Exchange, which he had enjoyed visiting very much.  The city of Manhattan was vibrant, loud, multi-cultural and fast paced.  It was a completely different world from what he’d grown accustomed to in Key West. 

But as much as Jimin was enjoying himself, had it not been for Kosuke’s urgent insistent that they meet, Jimin wouldn’t have made the trip.  He would have much preferred to have remained home with Jeongguk.  It was one of the most critical weeks in Jeongguk’s recovery as his doctor anticipated finally being able to release him from his grueling physical therapy.  Jeongguk had committed to the hard work and his team of doctors felt that he could go the rest of the way, on his own.  However, releasing him from their care required a series of tests to confirm his positive diagnosis.  The tests had been prescheduled for weeks in advance and Jeongguk couldn’t change the dates which meant he had to stay behind as Jimin traveled.  It was a pivotal moment in Jeongguk’s recovery and Jimin was going to miss it.  That fact bothered them both.

But Jimin knew that whatever Kosuke wanted, it was important.  Kosuke was not one to call frivolous meetings.  Jimin had tried several times to change the timing of the meeting, but his mentor refused, even after Jimin explained the importance of attending Jeongguk’s appointments.  It was not like Kosuke to ever put business in front of Jeongguk’s medical needs.  Despite knowing that Jimin was needed at home, Kosuke’s stubborn urgency persisted.  That was when Jimin knew that something was wrong.  It was the only reason that Jimin had agreed to meet.

Jimin’s mentor had given him absolutely no indication of what the meeting was about, despite Jimin probing and asking several times for an agenda.  He assumed that the urgent meeting had something to do with the opportunities for Posco amidst the construction boom that was happening in New York.  Jimin had already coordinated with Kumo to submit several bids for supplying the steel that was used on the massively tall buildings.  The process had long been underway, so Kosuke was late to the game if that was what he wanted to discuss.  It was impossible to know what the man wanted.  He loved the cloak of mystery.

While on the thought of Kosuke, Jimin wondered aloud, “Where is he?”  He looked around the restaurant and trained his eyes towards the hostess station up front.  The tall handsome Japanese man was nowhere to be seen.  It was not like Kosuke to run late, which made Jimin even more anxious.

Another twenty minutes went by.  Jimin placed his napkin on the table and headed to the hostess station to use the phone.

“Excuse me, may I make a long distance call?  You can put it on my tab,”  Jimin asked.

The hostess led Jimin to a private room with a single black phone hung on the wall.  She provided him with the full name of the restaurant.  Jimin dialed the operator, “Yes, I need to make a long distance call.”

The operator took his information and placed Jimin on hold.  He tapped his foot as he waited for Jeongguk to answer.  At the same time, he peeked his head through the black curtain to look towards the hostess station.  Kosuke still had not arrived.

“Hello!”  Jeongguk answered the phone in English.  He too had been taking English lessons at the university.  There was absolute joy in his voice.

“WOW, it’s good news isn’t it?  I mean, I was calling to see how it went, but judging from your voice, I can already tell – they cleared you?”  Jimin’s excitement matched his lover’s.

“Min!  How’s New York?  And YES, they cleared me.”

“New York is loud.  They cleared you?  You’re free?”

“Yes.  I’m so happy Min.  Its finally over and I can return to my normal life.”

“Oh baby, that’s wonderful,”  Jimin pumped his fists.  “You worked so hard to get to this point.”

Jeongguk was much more concerned about Jimin’s meeting with Kosuke than he was his own health news.  He jumped right in, speaking slightly over Jimin, “So...is your meeting done already?  What did Kosuke want?  Was this about the investments that you recommended for his enterprise?”

“He hasn’t shown up yet.  I’m still waiting and I’m getting nervous.  He’s about thirty minutes late.  That’s why I decided to call you.  I may as well use my time wisely while I’m waiting...oh Kookie, I have to go.  I see him.  I’ll call you later tonight from the hotel.  I’m so proud of you baby.  So proud.  I’m sorry that I couldn’t be there.  I love you.”

“Okay love you too, bye.”  Jeongguk disconnected.

Jimin quickly ran to the hostess counter, “Kosuke-hyung!  I was beginning to worry about you.  What took you so long?”

Kosuke looked flushed and frustrated.  “I’m getting old.  I got lost Jimin.  This city is so big and I thought I could find my way without a cab.  I’ve been all over this damn city walking in the wrong direction.  My apologies for being tardy.”  Kosuke smiled a genuine smile of happiness as he removed his handkerchief from his suit pocket and wiped the perspiration from his grey brow.

Jimin relished seeing his old friend again.  Kosuke was nothing if not stylish himself.  His wife was a former model who owned a fashion house in the heart of Tokyo.  She kept him dressed youthfully and sharply on trend.  Jimin laughed at his old friend and his claims of being old.  But beneath his GQ dress, his age was showing.  Overnight it seemed as if Kosuke had gone from the commanding six foot figure that Jimin idolized as a kid, to the aged grandfather who couldn’t remember his way.  It was shocking for Jimin to see.  Jimin had been so consumed by his reignited love affair with Jeongguk that he hadn’t kept in contact with Kosuke the same way that he had in his younger years.  Jimin stared a bit absentmindedly.

The hostess re-emerged and showed them back to their assigned table.  As soon as they were seated, Jimin reached across the table to pat Kosuke hard on the shoulder. 

He instantly grew staid and serious, “How – are you mentor?”

“Tired,” Kosuke responded swiftly.  “And that, is why I have asked you here.  I know you’re curious to know what was so urgent that I needed to pull you away from your care of Jeongguk.”

“Yes.  I’m very curious.  I should be with Jeongguk.  But instead I am here, so please, let me in on the secret.” Jimin smiled.

Kosuke jumped right in to it, “Jimin, there have been many, many changes to the Yakuza over the last ten years.  Since we inducted you into our organization, the entire conglomerate has grown three times over.  The ACC is no longer considered a group of bosses and under lords.  We are now serious businessmen with investment capital and the ability to grow or destroy business with one single slight of the pen.  We’ve restated our mission and we’re fully intent on helping businesses grow and thrive within the bounds of corporate regulation.  But Jimin, I’m embarrassed to say that I am of the old thinking.  The Yakuza meant something very different when I became the leader thirty years ago.  The powerful and sometimes bloody fist that often came with the Yakuza name is being phased out.  I fear that the organization has passed me by.  I don’t know how to continue us down this path that you started.”

“You’ve done exceptionally.  The growth is because of your leadership,”  Jimin advised.

“No Jimin, the growth is because I listened to you when you gave advice.  Through my proxy, it has been your leadership that has led to our potential being recognized.”  Kosuke took a sip of wine that the waitress placed in front of him.  He took a deep breath. 

As the sun positioned itself mid center of the sky, the rays shined through the window, highlighting the deeply etched wrinkles in Kosuke’s tired face.  The sprinkled mix of black and grey hair was no more.  It was now completely white.  His fingers were curled with years of use and his once formidable posture was replaced with a slight hump in his back that leaned him forward.  The theme of Kosuke’s aging once again played in Jimin’s head.  Jimin had always pictured his mentor as a young man full of vibrancy.  Even though the aging had happened slowly over time, Jimin had never seen it as clearly as he did the moment the sun revealed the truth.  Kosuke, the man that Jimin had known, respected and feared since he was just a young boy, was growing old.

Jimin spoke sternly, “You’re being ridiculous, your style of leadership will never go out of style.  Nothing has passed you by.  I simply made a few suggestions for the new direction.  But you, hyung, you are the one who made them a reality.” Jimin placed his hand on top of Kosuke’s and looked directly into his eyes,   “Hyung, what do you have to tell me?”  He feared that there was news of an illness or some other age related matter that had seeded doubt in Kosuke’s mind over his ability to lead.  The younger braced for the worst news possible.

“Ah, young Jimin.  Kosuke switched to Japanese, “私はあなたがなった男をとても誇りに思っています. あなたが1である. あなたが1である.”

Jimin laughed, “That is very kind of you to say.  But surely you didn’t drag me here to tell me that you were proud of me.”

“I’m stepping down as head of the Yakuza.  My time there is finished.  We need younger talent to lead the next generation of this powerful organization.”

Jimin sprung back, sitting fully upright.  “Hyung, This is surprising news.  I never knew you were even considering stepping down.  The organization will greatly miss your leadership.  I, personally will miss you tremendously.  But I’m committed to working with whoever you have chosen as your successor.  You have my word,”  Jimin smiled and sipped his water.

“That successor is you.  The Yakuza have selected you as our next leader.  You Jimin.  You are my successor,”  Kosuke said with a straight face.  The wrinkles in his forehead receded as he glared at Jimin.

Jimin’s eyes bulged.  His entire mouth full of ice cold water spewed across the table in a violent spray.  He choked as he feverishly grabbed his napkin and wiped his mouth.  “WHAT?”

Yosuke checked his $6000 suit for water droplets.  “I honestly don’t know why you’re so surprised.  The vote was taken five years ago.  We just didn’t tell you.  But surely you felt our bias towards you.  However the vote was not unanimous until recently.  A few members felt that you needed time to prove yourself.  After all, you’re very young and youth can sometimes move with disruptive turbulence.  But as twisted as this sounds, when you personally took care of Jung and his crew, the remaining dissenting members realized that you were the one.  You see Jimin – most men in your position would have hiredsomeone to take care of Jung and his men.  But not you.  You saw to it that it was done by your hand.  And although none of us ever want to see that again – it showed us what you were fully capable of.  The vote was unanimous after that.”

“Are you telling me that the same fucking shit that got me exiled is the same shit that got me appointed as the new leader?”

“No.  But those actions did allow others to see you in a new light.  Couple that with my rapidly increasing age and – its time Jimin.  Its time.  You were going to be appointed the new leader eventually anyway.  In all of Asia there is no one else who has your vision and your unique skill for walking that fine line between business and gang war fair.”  Kosuke laughed loudly.

Jimin thought about Kosuke’s words, “...and bias?  What bias have I ever received?”  Jimin was confused.

“Do you know how risky and expensive it was to make you disappear from Korea and erase all traces of your actions?  Do you know how many people had to be paid off or ‘taken care of’ to make sure they never spoke about anything they saw or heard?  You’ve been under our protection for months now.  Your entire family has been kept intact as well.  Do you think we would have done that for just anybody?  No Jimin.  We did it only for you.”

Jimin looked around the room to make sure no one was within ear shot, he leaned forward and aggressively whispered to Kosuke, “You can’t seriously think that I have the skill and acumen to run this type of organization!”

“I do.  And you...do.  If it’s not you, it’s not anyone.  Say yes Jimin.”

“You can’t just come in here and drop this in my lap and expect an answer.  I – I – I don’t know what to say...I mean I’m honored hyung, I really am...but...,”

Kosuke laughed, “Say yes.  Discuss it with Jeongguk and Kumo because this will affect them as well.  Jimin, if you’re concerned about the “old days” and the violence and criminal element that used to be woven into our organization, I can assure you that will all be under your control.  This organization will be run as you see fit.  Any remnants of that old thinking will be eliminated - by you.  This is your chance. You have always wanted to elevate us on a global scale, this is your time.  Please say yes.”

“I’ll think about it.  That’s all that I can say for right now.  I need time to process this.”

“Good.  You have time.  I will be traveling for the next five months.  My wife wants to go to travel. And then we plan on going to Disneyland next year and we need to start making plans.”

“Dis...what?”

“My retirement.  She says it’s her turn to come first and she has already started planning our retirement travels,”  Kosuke laughed again.  “Our first order of business will be Disneyland.”

Jimin looked at him with slight astonishment, that eventually melted into a full bodied laugh.  It was the oddest thing he had ever heard his mentor say in thirty years of knowing him.  “I’ll talk to Jeongguk and let you know my decision soon.”

“Good.  In the meantime, let’s eat.  All of that walking in circles has this old man famished.  Order anything and everything.  It’s on me.  This is a celebration.”

“I will not accept this as a celebration because I didn’t say yes.”

Kosuke nodded with respect.  “Say yes Jimin.  It will change you and Jeongguk’s lives forever.”

The following morning Jimin awoke early despite his flight getting in late from New York.  Once again he sat upon his side and watched as his husband slept.  His beauty was breathtaking.

To say that Jimin was stunned by Kosuke’s offer was an understatement.  In fact, gob smacked and awestruck were much better words.  Their conversation rested heavily on his mind, causing him to be unable to sleep.  However, there was no weighty contemplation on the table.  His answer to Kosuke’s request was a resounding ‘no’.  His mentor would have to find someone else to lead the Yakuza into the next decade.   

But what kept Jimin awake was not the fear of giving Kosuke his answer.  What bothered Jimin was knowing that he was indeed, the best man for the job.  Jimin was deflated because he knew that this was his chance to change lives, change legacies, build businesses and help millions of people across Asia.  The greatest honor of his lifetime had been laid at his feet, and he had to walk away from it in order to protect his relationship. 

Even though it was not of his doing, dabbling in the underworld had almost led to Jeongguk and Kumo’s deaths.  Jimin had a vision of leadership and he would never lead the Yakuza back down the path of criminality.  But his mere association with the group would be viewed as a return to the old life by Jeongguk.  He knew that if he dared even entertain Kosuke’s offer, that would be the end for he and his beloved.  He and his husband were embracing their new start.  They were on the road to redemption and the road did not include a path through the Yakuza.  And it was because of that loss of opportunity, that Jimin ached. 

Jeongguk croaked groggily, “Okay, yep, what is it this time?”

“Why are you awake?”  Jimin smiled at him.

“Because you’re awake...and because there’s a gun in the bed.”

“A gun?”  Jimin pushed back the sheets looking for a gun.  “There’s no gu...,”  He looked down and realized that his cock was so hard that it had created a full on tent in his pajama pants.  And his tent was angrily poking Jeongguk in the back.  “Oh, yeah, that, sorry.”

“Yeah that. Geezus Min,” Jeongguk joked. 

Jimin’s little friend between his legs was so riled up that it insisted on seeking out Jeongguk in a desperate plea for relief.  It had certainly been a long time since Jimin had been properly relieved.  Because of all of the medications and weakness in Jeongguk’s body, they had been unable to make love since being reunited.  In fact his husband seemed to have little desire for sex at all.  He was so busy with his recovery that he didn’t even have erections anymore.  And although the problem was of great concern to Jimin, he repressed them, just as any normal, caring spouse would do.  His primary objective was to not rush his husband into anything that he wasn’t ready for.  So as was his standard procedure, he pushed himself away from Jeongguk and willed his hard cock to relax.

“I didn’t even hear you come in last night.  Please, please don’t tell me that your meeting with Kosuke is why you suddenly can’t sleep again,”  Jeongguk asked.  “What happened Jimin, what did he say?”

Jimin had nothing to hide.  He had already decided to decline Kosuke’s offer, so he casually dropped the full truth, “The Yakuza has appointed me as their next leader.  It was a unanimous vote.  The position is mine if I want it. Kosuke is retiring and I’ve been chosen as his successor.  That’s why the meeting was so urgent.  He’ll be traveling for a few months and he needed to get the news to me before he left.”

Jeongguk jumped three feet.  By the time he had stopped recoiling, he was pressed against the wall.   “WHAT?” 

Jeon Jeongguk had been around organized crime his entire life;  as an admirer during his youth and as a detractor during his adulthood.  Thus no one on the planet understood how notorious and powerful that organization was as well as he did.  They were brutal, the most brutal, the most heartless, the most influential.  They were the definition of mobsters, despite the window dressing that had been done over the last few decades to change their image.  Terrible visions of Jimin once again being involved with such a seedy occupation, sickened him.  He was beside himself with fear.

“The fucking Yakuza?”  Jeongguk still stood pressed against the wall, almost as if he feared Jimin was going to attack him.  The news was just that viscerally repulsive.  “You?  You?  Why you?  Why not some thug off of the street?  Why YOU?  Why not someone Japanese?  Why you?”  Jeongguk repeated.  “Kosuke knows that we’re done with that life.  Between me and Kumo, we took twenty-three fucking bullets just to escape that life.  Why would he drag you back into this?  Why?   Why you?”

“Why not me?”  Jimin said defensively.  “I’m qualified and I’m capable.”  Jimin sat on the edge of the bed.  “Kookie, you don’t know anything about the modern day Yakuza.  They’re not the same organization.  I told you about all of the changes that I brought to the table when the inducted me as a member.  They’re business men now.  So much has changed since your cronies at the police department first started investigating them.  There is so much good that I could do as the head of an organization like that.  Yet I’m close enough to the street to know how to keep us out of trouble, how to avoid crossing the line into that criminal element.”

“You say that now, but what about those Xio’s of the world who continue to go rogue and fuck up everything around them.”

“Those types will never be allowed in.  That would never, ever be my focus.  I want to help small businesses grow, become a venture capitalist and invest in small companies legally without loan sharks and gambling.  I have the business acumen, I know how to do it.  I have the connections and as head of the Yakuza, I would be even more powerful with even more reach to help others.  I could change our part of the world.”

“Wait a fucking minute.  You’re not honestly considering this are you?”  Jeongguk stepped forward, ready to pounce if Jimin gave the wrong answer.

Jimin paused for much too long.  He knew that his answer was ‘no’ and he knew that he was only saying ‘no’ to save his marriage, but it still hurt very much to say out loud. 

“Jimin?” Jeongguk said pleadingly, as he waited for Jimin to give him the right answer.   His face full of anger suddenly collapsed into a face full of pain.  Jimin still did not answer which only sent Jeongguk’s anxiety into over load.  “JIMIN!  Answer me.  Are you considering this?”

“No.”  He finally breathed out quietly as he watched the crashing white caps of the ocean through their large bedroom window.  “Not for one second did I even consider it.  Because I know how you feel about this.  I expected you to react this way.  I would never put my aspirations ahead of you and your feelings.  I love you too much to do that to you.  My lifestyle has been traumatic for you.  Beginning with my own father, we have exposed you to horrors that no man should have to experience.  Even though I feel passionately about how this organization would be run under my leadership, I know how frightened you would be if I accepted this offer.  Kosuke gave me a few months to think about it.  I’ll be giving him my answer as soon as he’s back in Japan.  He’s traveling on official corporate business for the next five months and will be out of pocket for a while.  But once his travels are over, I’ll be flying to Japan to deliver my answer in person.  This is going to devastate him, but you’re my first priority, Jeongguk.  You.”

Although Jeongguk was relieved, there was a strange ache in the pit of his stomach because he knew his husband well enough to realize that he was devastated over not accepting the offer.  A surge of conflicting emotions ripped through the former detective as he watched the sadness in his husband’s eyes.  He knelt down in front of him and held both of his hands.  As he kissed the fingertips of each of his fingers he poured his heart out to him, “I just want to be happy.  I want to live.  I want you by my side. You’re too smart to be mixed up with all of this again.  But I fear that I’m holding you back.  Jimin, is this something – you want?”

“I have always been honest with you and I won’t stop now.  This is not just about me, it’s about us.  It’s about building a legacy that is bigger than anything we could have achieved with Posco.  We can truly help people.  I can truly fulfill my philanthropic aches till my heart’s desire.  What I did for the people of Guryong would be nothing compared to what I could do for the entire continent of Asia.  That is how powerful this position is.  So yes – this hurts to have to let this go.  But I will do anything to make you happy.  I will turn my back on all of it, if it means that I can have you for the rest of my days.  I want to grow old with you.  I want to be safe and happy too.  I can live without being the leader of the Yakuza.  I cannot live without you.”

“I know what an honor this is and I know that you would do a great job, but as with everything with that lifestyle, there’s danger lurking around every corner.  So many bad things can happen.  You made the right decision.  I love you for making this sacrifice, I really do.”

Seeing the relief of Jeongguk’s face reinforced for Jimin that he had done the right thing.  Still, his selfless act was difficult to reconcile with his true feelings.

“Kissing won’t cause trouble, right?”  Jimin didn’t wait for an answer.  He kissed his way into Jeongguk’s mouth, tickling the ridges that lay on the pink surface of his tongue.  As he powered past his mildly protesting lips, he gently suckled the thickness of the lower one; the one that held the lovely shape of a bow.  The one that mildly puffed whenever their kisses locked. 

Jimin spread his fingers and gripped either side of Jeongguk’s head, using his young lover’s ears as levers to pull him ever closer as he worked his way deeper and deeper into his warm mouth.

Jeongguk’s soul arose and passed into his husband as he greedily accepted his dominating possession.  His husband’s long, slithering, wet tongue pivoted slightly to swim towards the back of his throat.  Jeongguk reacted by opening his mouth even wider, pressing his palm gently into Jimin’s back to force their two bodies even closer together. 

For a few luxurious moments, Jimin lost his cautionary discretion.  He climbed into Jeongguk’s lap, straddling him like a cowboy raw backing a stallion.  He inhaled his husband’s wonderful scent.  He breathed into his lover’s ear, with a surge of moist air that filled the hollow shell with warmth.  He had moved far beyond kissing.  Jimin could suddenly feel the hard length of Jeongguk’s erection, nudging between his thighs. He wanted to restrain himself, but instead he ripped his shirt away and began to urgently grind him.

“I need you,” he forced the words into Jeongguk’s mouth as he kissed him once again.

Jeongguk was filled with physical agitation that penetrated every muscle in his body.  For the first time in months, he felt as if he might be able to keep his erection.  He dared himself to fantasize about the possibility of penetrating him again.  He wanted it so badly.  He wanted to please his CEO, like he did before the attack.  He wanted to give him everything, the pressure was building.  He clawed at Jimin’s shorts, eager to get him out them.

But then suddenly it was gone.  His cock was as limp as a wilted rose.  For the third week in a row, he had failed Jimin - again.  Jeongguk shook his head ruefully as he wrestled to push Jimin away from him.

“Stop. Stop.  Please Min, just stop!”  He managed to pry Jimin’s desperate body away from his.   Embarrassingly, he tried to explain.  “I -I can’t.  I’m not ready.  My fucking dick just won’t cooperate.”  He refused to look at Jimin.  He bounded from the bed, seething with anger towards his own body.  He pushed a stack of books from his desk and threw his pencil holder across the room.  He continued in anger, “Find someone Jimin...because I can’t do this.  Find someone who can satisfy you.  I can’t take care of you anymore.  I can’t.”  Jeongguk had a flair for the dramatic.  He threw one last book before locking himself in the bathroom. 

Once he was safely away from his lover, he allowed the tears to fall.  With his back propped against the door, he wrapped his arms around his knees and settled over the cold tile.  Jung had taken so much from him, but by far, this was the worst.  Taking away Jeongguk’s ability to satisfy his husband was torturous and the worst form of cruelty for both of them.  He wept for another five minutes before the anger once again returned.  There he sat, passing back and forth through the poles of emotional extremes, unsure which represented him best.

The day that Jeongguk had re-emerged from the dead and plucked Jimin from that wheat field was the happiest day of Jimin’s life.  But what Jimin never expected was the complexity of what it would take to find their way back to each other.  Arguments, memory gaps, awkwardness – it was all foreign for them and they both had trouble adjusting. 

As the time passed, Jimin began to worry more and more about the sex.  Not just for his sake, but for Jeongguk’s too.  Jimin pretended that sex didn’t matter, orgasms didn’t matter, the physical didn’t matter.  But they both knew that was a lie.  In their very uniquely cultivated relationship, sex was a foundational pillar.  Without sex, their reunion felt incomplete.  Because of that feeling of loss, Jimin was riddled with guilt and that didn’t help the situation.  Even though he knew Jeongguk was not ready, Jimin longed for him.  He desired to feel him inside of him once again.  He missed the emotional entanglement of their lovemaking.  He missed the feeling of being desired, and conquered and worshipped by the only man he had ever loved.  And that neediness often manifested itself, causing problems that would undoubtedly lead to Jeongguk locking himself in the bathroom.   

If Jimin were a better man, a stronger man, he would have been able to put those feelings aside and just be thankful for the progress that Jeongguk had made.  But Jimin was transfixed by memories of what used to be.  To the best of his knowledge, Jeongguk hadn’t even experienced a lasting erection since he’d been back. 

Jimin couldn’t even bring himself to talk to Jeongguk’s doctors about the situation because he didn’t want to be judged or chastised for thinking about sex.  His poor husband had been in a coma for months.  It was pathetic and selfish to be consumed with having his body.  Jimin felt debauched for allowing the thoughts to even cross his mind.  But he had to be honest with himself and admit that it was bothering him.

Jimin stared towards the bathroom door.  He could hear sniffles coming from the other side.  He pulled on his robe and crawled over to the door.  There he sat with his legs crisscross as he rested his upper body against the cold wood.

Jimin started, “I’m sorry for pushing you.  I shouldn’t have done that.”

Jeongguk didn’t answer.

Jimin continued, “I love you no matter what.  No matter what.  Do you understand?”

Jeongguk’s sudden voice startled Jimin, “It’s not just because I can’t.  It’s because I’m scared.”

Jimin smiled.  He pressed his face against the door to project his voice more clearly, “Scared?  Scared of what, what has you frightened?  Tell me, I’ll have it murdered,”  Jimin told a droll joke.

“On the road to redemption, there is no murder,”  Jeongguk bit back with his voice muffled by the thick pine that separated them.  

“Ok.  Seriously, talk to me and while you’re at it, explain to me why you’re being so hard on yourself.”

“Because...I can feel how much you need me.  You’re so fucking horny all of the time, and there’s nothing I can do about it.  Its torture.”

Jimin lightly kissed the door where he imagined Jeongguk’s head rested.  “You’re afraid that you’ll never be able to make love to me again?”

“Yes, that amongst other things.”

“Good, we have a starting place because I’ve been terrified to even bring it up.  I know we need to talk about it, but it seems so trivial considering everything that you’ve been through.”

Jeongguk corrected him, “You mean everything that we’ve been through.  Let’s not minimize your pain.  Besides, it’s not trivial at all.  It’s part of what defines us.  There’s another level that we reach when we make love.  As much as we love each other, that physical part of us is still very important.  I’m not sure we could survive without it.”  Jeongguk’s voice was distant as if he had moved away from the door.

“We could survive if we had to,”  Jimin assured him, “Tell me what else is bothering you.”

Jeongguk opened the door.  Still sitting on the floor, he turned to face Jimin and then fully purged his heart, “Disappointing you.  Hurting you.  Not being good like I used to be.  Forgetting how to do certain things...pick a struggle...I have all of them,”  Jeongguk said sadly.

“Kookie none of that is possible.  Were you not taking notes in class, our love transcends all of those things.”

“I’m not even sure how long I can...um...stay hard,”  Jeongguk was so embarrassed to confess the things he was saying.  “I used to be able to stay hard as a rock for hours.”

“...days,”  Jimin interjected with a giggle.

“Don’t make it any worse than it already is.”

“I’m sorry baby, it was just a joke.”  Jimin tried to be more serious,  “What’s the longest you’ve been able to keep it up?”

“A couple of seconds maybe, but nothing that lasts long enough for me to fuck you with.”

“I’m sure there’s plenty in the tank for a two minute fuck.  You know, like the morning quickies you used to love.”  Jimin smiled.  He wanted so badly to encourage his melancholy lover. 

“I can’t even guarantee that,” Jeongguk was close to tears again.

“What do you remember – about us?”

“I remember almost everything.  I remember how it felt and how much I loved it. I remember how much I loved you and how I wanted to please you.  I remember trying really hard not to cum too fast.  But most of all I remember the smell of your hair, softness of your skin, taste of those pink lips.”  Jeongguk scooted across the white tile floor so that he could be closer to Jimin. He closed his eyes and kissed Jimin’s lips open until their tongues met.  But just as quickly he pulled away,  “God I miss you so much Jimin, but I don’t know how to get back.”

“Baby, listen to me.  Just the fact that you’re still interested is a start.  That is really good news because for a second there, I thought you had taken a vow of celibacy to go with this new road of redemption we seem to be traveling,” Jimin joked and Jeongguk finally laughed.  “We’re in no hurry here.  You have to build up stamina again, that’s all.  We’re destined.  Whatever happens between us has to be natural, not forced.  Let’s just let it come to us.  You know that I’m patient and I can wait for you forever.”

“You’re a liar.  Based on that stiffy that was poking my leg, you don’t have forever. You need a solution now.”

“No, I don’t.  I get hard, its natural.  Don’t take that as some type of signal that I need to be fucked right away.  There’s no pressure here.  Besides, can you blame me for getting a little excited?  You’re literally the sexiest man alive.  We’ll get there, I promise,”  Jimin giggled.

“What if I can’t?”

“You will.  Just - give it time.”

Jeongguk gave Jimin another quick kiss before saying one last thing, “By the way baby.  The door is never actually – locked.”


The Seagulls that had been so quiet, suddenly streaked morning greetings across the newborn yellow sky.  A low bellowing horn from the harbor signaled the first boats arriving for the day.  The tide busied itself by reversing its course and pulling in the seaweed, crabs, and empty shells that were to be deposited on the powdery soft sand. 

And as he did every morning, Jimin closed his eyes to listen to the foamy wave caps roll against the shore.  The seaside symphony was majestic.  But the sounds were much richer with Jeongguk now by his side.

Jimin watched through his window as the day came to life.  The rays from the determined sun bent around the corners of the long drapes that covered the windows.  Intermittent dapples of light danced against the reflective surfaces in their bedroom.  Morning was the most peaceful time.         

Jeongguk rolled to his side as he heard Jimin stir, “Good Morning.”

“Hi,”  Jimin said listlessly.  There was an emptiness behind his eyes and it concerned Jeongguk.  “How are you this morning?”

“I’m good,”  Jimin lied.  Even though he and Jeongguk had closed the matter, Jimin could still not stop thinking about Kosuke’s offer.  He thought that he would just be able to put it behind him and move on with his life, but that just wasn’t the case. 

If there was one thing that Jeongguk’s accident had not taken from him, it was his astute nature and his ability to read Jimin like no one else.  He knew something was wrong and he had an idea of what it was, “Why are you still thinking about this?  I thought we decided that it was best for all of us to just move on from Kosuke’s offer.”

“It was...I mean it is.  I just...,”  Jimin paused.  He didn’t want to start an argument with Jeongguk over the same issue again. “I know that I could change things.  You just don’t understand.  You don’t see my vision, you don’t understand the Yakuza like I do.  I’ve been with these men for years.  I understand them inside and out.  This is not a South Street part two where I’m just playing the same old game with the same old thugs.  These are corporate giants.  Businessmen who want to make money and avoid jail.  They want to do things the right way.  I know how this organization works and I know how to change it.  I could do it,” Jimin said passionately.

“An organization like that does not change just because some well-dressed businessman enters the building with fancy flow charts.  The Yakuza are almost a deity.  They operate completely untouched by the law.  There is no moral compass, nor are they looking to install one.  Jimin, I’m going to say this once and then I will never speak of it again.”  Jeongguk made very certain eye contact,  “I love you to the depths of my soul.  But, I will leave.  Forever.  If you decide to do this, consider me gone.  I’ve already taken 15 bullets for you, CEO.  You promised me that this was our second chance.  You promised.  If you break that promise, I will never forgive you.  That’s all that I have to say.”  Jeongguk lifted himself from the bed and disappeared into the restroom.

Jimin sat up.  He was stunned.  Never in their years of dating had Jeongguk ever given him an ultimatum, never.  His husband had always been willing to stand by his side, even if he didn’t agree with his choices.  So for him to put their entire relationship on the line meant something.  Jeongguk’s show of force was big and powerful and it frightened Jimin.  The thought of losing him was crippling.  He couldn’t lose him again.  He couldn’t.  The addiction to his detective was as strong as ever.  He kicked his covers free and rushed into the bathroom behind Jeongguk who had already climbed into the shower.

Through the glass, they watched each other wordlessly for several minutes.  Jimin leaned against the sink and just absorbed him.  Their love was so powerful that he never thought it could be broken, but here Jeongguk stood, threatening to do just that. 

Jimin wished fervently that he could cry, but the tears just wouldn’t fall.  In order for him to access that part of himself, he needed his Kookie.  But his Kookie, was not the same man he had once been.  His near death experience had changed his perspective, and his lurid fascination with all things mafia was definitely over.  Jimin feared that if he persisted with his talk of leading the Yakuza, he himself would become the next casualty.

Jimin examined Jeongguk from head to toe.  As Jeongguk stepped back into the hot flow of water, his hair darkened and thinned as the water glided over his skin.  Steam veiled his large doe eyes that still gazed resolutely at him.  Jimin continued to stare back.  The only thing that he could process was the sheer beauty of his lover’s body.  His breath stalled as Jeongguk stepped back to lather himself.  Jimin’s cock sprang forward, but he was too busy gawking at Jeongguk to realize it. 

“I won’t take it.  I’m sorry for talking about this over and over.  I won’t let anything come between us, not even this.  I’m going to tell them no, I promise.  You win,”  Jimin surrendered.

“There is no win or lose.  There is only my perspective and yours.  I’m not sure that either is wrong.”  Jeongguk opened the glass shower door, “Come here.”

Jimin immediately obeyed.  The tone in Jeongguk’s voice owned him.  Whatever he wanted, he was going to get. 

“Take your pants off and get in with me.”

“But...I thought we were trying to avoid this...until...you know...you were ready,”

“Jimin, my dick isn’t moving.  Its laying there like play doe.  But yours is so hard that I’m worried it may jump off of your body.  If I can’t make love to you, I can at least...help you.”

Jimin stepped into the hot shower, right into Jeongguk’s arms.  His body was large and it sheltered him like a warm blanket.  He stepped into Jeongguk’s chest and buried his forehead right between his two muscular breast plates.  “I love you.  I can’t lose you.  Please.”

Instead of making more promises, Jeongguk immediately fell down to his knees and took Jimin’s neglected cock into his mouth.  The hot water pelted them, fogging up their passionate exchange.  Almost immediately, Jimin tossed his head back as he felt his dick begin to throb inside of Jeongguk’s mouth.  His lungs moved with violent inhalations as he balled his hands into tight fists.  His moans bounced off of all four walls of the shower glass as he beat Jeongguk across his broad shoulders.  Water from the steamy shower escaped down his throat. 

Jeongguk released him briefly to explore all areas of Jimin’s groin.  Jimin inhaled sharply and watched Jeongguk lick the fragile wisps of hair around his nuts.  But that wasn’t enough.  Jimin needed more.  With one hand, he forcefully grabbed clumps of his husband’s hair and pulled his head back.  With the other hand, he wrapped it around his shaft and forced his dick’s tip between his lover’s lips until once again he was surrounded by warmth.  His hips rotated back and forth.  He fed him all of his cock until he could feel the slick rear of his throat.  He came.  Quietly, he stroked through his release until his cock no longer pulsated.  He pushed himself in and out until he felt his own fluids flood the inside of his husband’s mouth.

Jeongguk swallowed Jimin’s salted gift, so by the time he stood to kiss him, only faint remnants of his flavor remained.  “I love you.  I love you.  Please let’s not fight about this anymore.”  Jeongguk exited the shower, leaving Jimin there alone.

Weeks later and things continue to be awkward...

Jimin was exhausted from class.  He’d been speaking English for four hours straight and he was tired.  He just wanted to have a good old Korean conversation, but for homework, he had to find an English movie and watch it in its entirety without subtitles.  It was fortunate that the Valentine’s Day Massacre starring Jason Robards was on television.  He felt the theme was appropriate. 

He took a nice long shower and dressed in his favorite wine colored silk robe before collapsing on the couch.  He could see his husband sitting alone on the beach, watching the tide roll out.  He looked so peaceful, handsome.  Jimin wanted to be with him but Jeongguk was meditating.  It was a new hobby that he’d taken up for greater spiritual awareness and better mind control.  He needed time for himself.  It was important.  So Jimin didn’t disturb him.

About 30 minutes into the movie, Jeongguk finally made his way inside.  He gave Jimin a kiss and then headed straight to the shower.  A few minutes later, he too made his way back to the kitchen to fix a quick snack. 

Suddenly he laughed, “Are you really watching a gangster movie?”

Jimin turned with a naughty smile, “Yes. But in my defense, it’s homework,”  Jimin joked.  “I’m not allowed to use subtitles so I needed to be able to follow the story line without them.  Mobsters seemed like a subject I could relate to.”

“You’re a CEO.  You were a mobster for about ten hours one day.  That’s about it,”  Jeongguk teased back. 

Jimin sat up and offered Jeongguk some of his popcorn.  “Join me?  This movie is pretty good,”  Jimin shrugged.

Jeongguk loved popcorn.  He reached his large hand into the bowl and scooped up an arm full.  He sat next to Jimin, dropping light butter kernels all over the floor.

Jimin stared straight ahead nonchalantly, but his eyes crept to the very corners of his sockets to try to peek at Jeongguk as he sat next to him.  He didn’t want to stare, but he desperately wanted to stare.  Jeongguk was so gorgeous and he smelled like fresh ocean and cherry blossoms. 

Possibly it was the lack of sex, but everything about his Kookie was delectable, like something straight out of a porn movie.  Jimin was ultra-sensitive to his every move, every sound, every scent.  It was obscene. 

Jeongguk had fully regained all of his strength.  He was even running three miles every morning which caused the return of his stallion like physique that had dwindled away during his illness.  He was an absolute dream and Jimin craved him.  But he didn’t want to pressure him. 

“No pressure,”  he accidently said out loud.

“Huh?”

“Nothing,”  Jimin shook his head.

Jeongguk dropped more popcorn on the floor than in his mouth.  Jimin continued to slyly watch him as he chewed loudly; smiling at different junctures during the movie.  Each time the former detective smiled, his dimples would curve around the sides of his mouth. He sat with his legs crossed, bare feet bouncing gently to disperse his excess energy.  The robe he was wearing was not familiar to Jimin, but judging from his embroidered initials of “JJ” on the breast pocket, it was likely a gift from Kumo. Unlike Jimin’s robe which met his knees, Jeongguk’s robe stopped short just above his midthigh.  Very on-trend from the latest Fall Gucci runway show of 1967, and definitely from Kumo.  The stallion’s long bulky legs extended from the shallow opening of the robe.  If Jimin turned his head just right, he could see Jeongguk’s naked balls each time he walked to the kitchen to make more popcorn. 

Jimin wanted to lick him.  Instead, he licked his lips to moisten them, but inadvertently held the corner of his bottom lip inside of his mouth so that he could suck it.  His tongue worked busily as he imagined what it would be like to attack his husband’s balls.  Suddenly Jimin’s dick jumped and pressed aggressively against the hem of his silk robe.  With one casual move, he fetched a blanket that sat on the end of the couch and used it to cover himself.  Jeongguk felt pressured whenever Jimin got hard in front of him.  So Jimin hid his erection as best he could.  Jimin’s cock stayed hard throughout the entire movie.  The thing just wouldn’t go down and it was becoming annoying.  He ignored it, just as mature adults were sometimes forced to do.

Once the movie was over, Jeongguk realized what a mess he had made of the popcorn.  He knelt down on his hands and knees to scoop up the popcorn that he had dropped all over the floor.  Jimin’s mouth dropped open as he watched from behind.  Jeongguk’s robe barely covered his ass.  Like the last phase of a full moon, both of his cheeks were visible just beyond the length of the robe.  His muscular thighs merged into his juicy ass creating what Jimin could only describe as divinity in motion.  As Jeongguk crawled around the floor, the space between his gapped legs revealed his large round balls and softened cock that dangled below his body. Each time Jeongguk reached forward, Jimin could see just the hint of his slit between his ass cheeks.

“Holy shit,” Jimin whispered after closing his eyes.  He trembled.  He was quickly becoming over stimulated. 

Like a lion stalking his prey, Jimin quietly sloped down from the couch and crawled behind Jeongguk.  His eyes glazed over as he stared at that tiny little slit that taunted him.  He just wanted a small taste.  One quick lick.  No pressure, just minor relief from an urgent ache.  Jimin didn’t want to be fucked, he wanted something else.  As Jeongguk continued to crawl, Jimin grew closer and closer, crawling quietly behind him.  With his tongue extended as far as it could go, he suddenly found his mark.  Two quick flicks of his tongue and he was in heaven.  The area tasted like soap and smelled of cherry blossoms.  He licked again before Jeongguk had a chance to protest. 

“Ah fuck what are you doing?”  Jeongguk was completely taken aback.  He stopped his popcorn crawl and looked behind him.  He had no explicit memory of ever having his ass licked before but every instinct in his body told him that this was his favorite thing. 

“I’m sorry, it just looked so sweet.  I had to taste it,”  Jimin explained.  His eyes were still glazed over and the naughty look of seduction danced inside of his pupils. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”

“Of course not.  How would I have any idea of what you’re thinking?  Use your words,”  Jeongguk said with agitation.  His asshole was wet, he didn’t understand why.

Jimin opened his robe, exposing himself,  “Jeonggukooooookie.  Can you crawl over to me?”  Jimin laid on his back on the carpet.  His long tongue extended from his mouth like a cobra rising into the air.

Jeongguk’s cock was still soft, but he didn’t let that deter him.  He knew that Jimin would be understanding.  “What do you want me to do?”  Jeongguk said as he stared at Jimin’s seductive tongue.

“Sit on my face.”

“Yeah.  Everything about that sounds right.”  Jeongguk removed his robe and climbed over Jimin’s face.  The memories suddenly came roaring back as he positioned his hole just above Jimin’s wriggling tongue. 

With one clawed hand on each side of Jeongguk’s ass, Jimin parted him, revealing the wrinkled hole that he wanted to devour.  He started with gentle kisses as he delicately pressed his thick lips against him.

“Yeah, I like this a lot,”  Jeongguk cried out.  Jeongguk rested on his knees that were on either side of Jimin’s head.    

Once Jeongguk’s space was nice and wet, Jimin extended his tongue and pressed it into his husbands tight space. 

“HO-LEEEEE SHIT WHAT IS THIS?”  Jeongguk began to bounce instinctively.  “Why don’t I remember this?”

“Ride it baby.  Let me fuck you with it,”  Jimin mumbled with a mouth full of his husband’s ass wrapped around his tongue.  He tickled, sucked and kissed the overly sensitive area just beyond Jeongguk’s rim.

“Fuck...,”  Jeongguk felt his cock spring to life. 

He knew his hardness was only going to last for a few seconds but he desperately wanted to cum while his husband’s tongue was still fucking him.  Before he could do anything, Jimin grabbed his cock and began stroking it.  It had been months and months and months since Jeongguk had last orgasmed.  And although it was coming fast, Jeongguk knew it was going to be a big one.  He bounced harder over Jimin’s tongue as Jimin began to stroke Jeongguk’s dick to its fullest length. 

Jimin moaned and writhed underneath him, “You taste so goooood,” he hissed in mumbled grunts.

“I’m cumming,” Jeongguk said sharply.  It had only taken ten seconds for Jimin’s little ass munching session to turn Jeongguk into a squirting mess.  He released.  Like exploding fireworks, Jeongguk’s cum shot from his tip and flew high into the air, landing on the carpet in thick wet lumps.  Jeongguk’s voice was raspy and low as he bounced his ass up and down like a slut in a whorehouse. 

Jimin secretly wondered if he would have to someday give him a full dick.  Jeongguk had always been a happy top, but he wondered if the time had come for them to re-evaluate.  Maybe his time in a coma had changed his preferences?  It was a delightful thought to have.

After a few confused screams, Jeongguk fell over.  He breathed long slow breaths as his body recovered.  Jimin fell over the top of him and kissed him madly.  He was so proud of him.

“You came for me! You stayed hard long enough to get through an orgasm baby.  This is a really big deal!”  Jimin squealed.

“I did.  But did I have fucking a choice?  That was fucking insane.  You’re an ass licker?  How did I manage to forget that?  Do that to me every day for the rest of my life.”

Jimin laughed and kissed Jeongguk again.  “You kept an erection and you had an orgasm. An orgasm!  How did it feel?  Are you ok?  Are you sore, do you want me to do it again?  You’re getting better Kookie. This is a great start.”

“It is.  I never knew that something like that could help me...recover.  You’re so patient with me.  I’ll never forget this you know.  And Jimin, I promise, I’ll get there.  I’ll get better.  We can get back to the way things were.”

“Kookie, I love you...you’re my husband...my forever.  Patience is the least that I can give you.”

“Yeah, I know, but you could have...any man during this time...but instead you’ve chosen to wait for me and help me through this...,”

Jimin took over, “...let me explain something, humbly.  I could have any man.  Any man out there, even some of the straight ones on this island.  But while you were missing, I took a vow of celibacy.  I decided long ago that I didn’t want any other man inside of my body – ever.  I decided, out of respect for you, that our last time together would be my last time ever.  I don’t have to have sex Kookie, but I do have to have you.”

“It’ll be your turn soon.  Just give me a little more time.”

Jimin smirked, “Don’t worry about me, Kookie.  I’ll get mine soon enough...”

July 4th, 1967-  Fourth of July in America

Jimin and Jeongguk sat out on the beach in front of the bungalow to watch the fireworks.  Many of their neighbors had gathered to do the same.  Jimin, Jeongguk and Park Jihon, the Korean owner of the local bar, had become good friends.  They sat on the beach together and spoke in Korean about American traditions and how Jeongguk was fairing in the new country.  The fireworks were splendid.  And even though the three men of Korean decent had little connection to the origins of the celebration, they appreciated its meaning and enjoyed the display.  After hours of conversation, Jihon eventually bid them all goodnight and headed home for the evening.  It was late. 

The beach that had once been filled with patriots watching the light display, was suddenly abandoned.  The final snap of the last firework left Jimin and Jeongguk alone, looking out over the pitch black horizon.  Jeongguk quickly drew a fire in the fire pit because he didn’t want Jimin to feel uncomfortable.   Jimin watched him as Jeongguk busied himself building a fire.  He was so sensitive to Jimin’s demons, that he took it upon himself to always chase them away.  Jimin loved him for that – as well as about 13 million other reasons.

The happy, carefree couple played a silly game of burying their feet into the warm sand.  They shared silly kisses and told silly jokes.  They teased each other while curling seaweed between their toes.  The two were different people in this setting, and their pasts seemed like distant memories.  Their troubles, sins, and regrets were all washed out to sea.  

Jimin laughed a loud booming laugh that was exactly like Xio’s, “You still bring out the kid in me.”

“I’m just happy that the kid in you still exists.”

“It does.  Somehow...it does,”  Jimin’s laugh faded, as did his smile.

“Maybe you’re just reclaiming the kid you lost when you were three years old,”  Jeongguk said seriously.  “Jimin, I’m so sorry for what happened to you and the shit with your mom and your little brother.  I remember.  I remember everything you told me about it.  I’m so sorry that you have to carry that pain with you.”

“I’m at peace with what I did.  Believe it or not, I found a silver lining in my brother’s death.   He died so young that he didn’t have to endure a life time of torture at the hands of that brutal woman.  If I could take back what I did to her, I would.  But...the past is the past,”  Jimin said coldly.  He truly had no feelings for his mother.  “I had more passion for Xio than I did my fucking mother.  And you know how I hated Xio.  Mother was a drunk, worthless, bitch who would have killed all three of her children if given the chance.  My father was terrible too, but at least he loved me.  He really, truly loved me.”  Jimin did not cry despite the shakiness in his voice.  His child like disposition was suddenly gone.  It was too heavy of a topic for a breezy night on the beach.   But, Jeongguk had never had a chance to talk to Jimin after his confession about killing his mom.  He needed to talk about it.

“Did you ever tell your father what she did to you?  Locking you in the closet?”  The fire flared, illuminating Jimin’s face at the exact moment that Jeongguk asked him the question.  It was just enough light for Jeongguk to see Jimin’s expression change.

“I had to tell him.  He needed to know why my little brother had died.  I was the only one who understood.  I was the only one who could explain it.  His body was covered with rat bites.  They had attacked him, even after his death.  I had to tell my dad.”

“What did he say?”

“He cried.  I had never before seen him cry until that day.  He apologized to me and begged me to forgive him for not protecting me.  Dad honestly didn’t know anything about it.  And he was even more mortified when he realized that she had started locking my brother in there too.  I didn’t know she was doing it either, until the day that I found him.  We both found out too late.  But Xio...,”  Jimin clenched his jaw in anger, “...that fucker knew what she was doing.  He knew what she was doing to me and he knew what she was doing to him.  I was away at college, but he still lived at home, trying to brainwash my father into turning the fucking business over to him.  Xio could have told dad what was happening, he could have helped us.  But he enjoyed seeing us tortured just as much as mother did.  It was their way of getting back at us for being the only two that my father truly loved.”

Jeongguk spoke softly “You know, I asked Xio why he never helped you.”

“What did he say?”  Jimin stared at Jeongguk.

“He said he was too young and that he was taught to always mind his own business,”  Jeongguk said bitterly.

“Piece of shit,” Jimin scoffed and shook his head.  “He used to stand outside of the door and laugh at me.  He knew.  He knew everything.”

“Min.  I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be.  I have peace now Kookie.  The fact that I’m able to sit here and talk to you about this without flying into a rage is proof that I’m at peace.”

A sudden gust of wind swept their voices out to the sea, as the receding tide continued to roll behind them.  It was a sharp reminder that the evening was progressing and the temperatures were dropping.  Jeongguk managed to kick his feet free of the sand tomb that Jimin had placed around him.  Once again the fire flashed from the fire pit, allowing him to see the details of Jimin’s expression. 

“Jimin.  I think you need to see someone...about the shit with your mom and Xio.  I know we both talked about therapy, but I think we should make a commitment, here and now to heal.  The more that I meditate and align my mind and body, the more I realize that I need help to get to the next level.  So do you.”

“I can’t argue with that.  Not one bit.  I can make that commitment to you.  But first, since we’re purging our inner most thoughts.  I need to revisit something that you told me a few weeks ago.”  Jimin paused for a moment.  He was nervous to bring up what could potentially be a triggering event for Jeongguk, but he had to know.   “I hope it’s not too difficult for you to talk about, but I need to understand the full story.”

Jeongguk smiled at him, “Of course.  We have no secrets.  We never have.  Ask me anything. What full story are you after?”  Jeongguk said lovingly as Jimin laid his head in his lap. 

“Kookie.  I need you to explain to me what happened with the South Street gang when you were a teenager.  Please be honest with me.  What were you doing with an older guy?  And did my dad know about it?”  Jimin asked sternly.

“It was harmless.  And your dad knew nothing about it.  I think one of the other leaders below your dad may have known...but not Mr. Park.”

Jimin was relieved. “Are you sure?  They were all deviants, dad included.  He fucked every whore in his prostitution ring.  That’s part of the reason mom stayed drunk,”  Jimin explained.  He paused again before asking the question he really wanted to know, “Did any of the gang members ever try to...force you to do things that you didn’t want to do?”  Jimin asked.  

It was a terrible question and Jeongguk wondered what had prompted it.  There was a very threatening tone in Jimin’s voice, one that sounded oddly like an appetite for revenge.  It made Jeongguk nervous.  The vengeful beast that lived within Jimin was not dead, despite Jimin swearing that it would not appear again. 

“Why would they ever do that?”  Jeongguk was almost offended.  He considered many of those men his friends.

“You said that Xio had information on you.  Things you didn’t want him to tell me.  I need you to tell me what those things were. I don’t ever want to hear any of this from anyone else.  What happened with those guys?  They were fucking barbarians under my father’s reign and I know what they were into.  I need to make sure they never hurt you.”

“And if they did?  What will you do Min?  What building will you set ablaze this time?  Tell me.” Jeongguk folded his arms.

Jimin was reminded of his promise.  The road to redemption meant that vengeance was no longer in his repertoire, no matter how justified. His jaw clenched and he refused to answer.

“For the record, I loved those guys – all of them.  They were like a bunch of rowdy, immoral, murderous, gangster uncles. They protected me, looked out for me, kept me out of trouble.  They never hurt me, especially with anything sexual.  No, Min. No one ever hurt me or threatened to hurt me.  I told you, my one encounter was completely harmless.  But...,”

“But what?”  Jimin sat forward, his eyes glowing in the light of the fire.

“One of them sucked my dick as a birthday present,”  Jeongguk rolled to his side laughing.

“Who?”  Jimin was very surprised to hear this information.

“Oh no.  I’m not giving you any names.  Just know that I was underage and he...wasn’t. And it was the best dick suck of my life.”  Jeongguk kicked his feet up and slung small clumps of sand through the air. 

“You were underage?  How old?”

“Seventeen.  He sucked my dick as a gift for my 17th birthday.”

“That’s really fucked up.  Why would they touch you?  You were a kid.  Unless...wait a minute...unless they were close to your age.  I know most of those guys.  There were some pretty young ones in the crew.  It had to be one of the younger ones...,”  Jimin pondered as he tried to figure it out.

“Nooooo, don’t you dare.  I don’t want you to know and I don’t want you trying to find out.  That’s what I didn’t want Xio to tell you.  Yes, I was underage.  No, he shouldn’t have touched me, but YES, I fucking loved it.  It was my first true gay experience and it helped me understand a lot about myself.  So don’t you go trying to chase him down for vengeance or any of that shit.”  Jeongguk teased Jimin, but he was also serious.

“Was it just the one time?  Did he want more,”  Jimin’s tone was measured.  He didn’t want to appear upset, but he needed to know more. 

“He didn’t want more – but I sure fucking did.  He was hot as fuck!”

Jimin was caught off guard.  “You found these guys attractive?”

“I was young, gay and hormonal, so yep.  I did.  It was harmless.  And now you know the entire story.  Can we drop it now?  I have something more exciting to talk about.”

“I’m a better dick sucker than him though, right?” Jimin asked oddly.

“Park Jimin!”

“I own dick sucking.  I’m the king...right?”

“Min, are you jealous?”

“No.  Of course not...well possibly a little.”

“Don’t be.  I was seventeen and it was literally my first nut with another man.  You can’t compare yourself to that.”

Jimin sat in Jeongguk’s lap.  “I’m better though right?  At sucking dicks, I’m better, right?”

“I was accepted into a very special program today.  I’m going back to school, like Kumo.”

“That’s amazing.  But did you just change the subject?”

“I start this fall.”  Jeongguk rose to his feet and gathered up the blankets before dashing out the fire.  “It’s getting cold out here.  Let’s head back inside.”

“Yeah, ok.  I mean, in order for him to be better than me, he would have to have experience doing it which meant he was probably gay.”  Jimin continued to try to figure it out.

“Did you hear me?  I enrolled in school today.  I was accepted into a very prestigious program, even though my English isn’t perfect.  I still scored high enough to get in.  Aren’t you excited about me going to school?”

“I am very proud of you,”  Jimin said absentmindedly. 

They stepped inside as Jimin began calling off various names from his dad’s old mafia crew.  Jeongguk found it adorable that the big bad former CEO was jealous.

“Let’s go.  Drop your pants.  Let me redeem myself.  I must be number one,”  Jimin joked.

“You are ridiculous.  And I never said you weren’t number one.  I said that he was special because he was my first orgasm with another person.  You never forget that first one, you know that.”

He teased Jeongguk, “My tongue is longer, I can be unforgettable too.”

“Stop it.”

Jeongguk went about his business as Jimin continued to wander around the house calling out more and more names.  He was determined to figure out who had made a move on his husband.  Jimin followed Jeongguk into the bathroom, making a case for why his blow jobs were the best.  He stood at the shower door for at least five minutes bantering on about nothing. 

Jeongguk rolled his eyes, “Pull off your clothes and come here.”

Jimin undressed painfully slow as his mind focused on potential dick sucking culprits in his dad’s crew.  Finally Jeongguk pulled him into the shower with him to wash the sand out of his hair.

“Of all of the things that I would think would rile you up. Who knew this would be one of them?”

“Tell me who.  I have to know,” Jimin begged.

“You don’t have to know.  You can’t control everything, Jimin.” Jeongguk washed Jimin’s back and swept away the sand with large white puffy lathers of soap.  After they were both clean, they stepped out of the shower and stepped into their robes.  “You know I could be really hurt right now.”

“Hurt?  Why?  What do you mean?” Jimin spun to look at him.

“I just made a huge announcement and you basically ignored it.  You didn’t even ask me what I was going to study.”

“Oh, Kookie I’m sorry.  You’re right, I’m focused on the wrong thing.  I’m sorry.  What do you plan to study?”  Jimin smiled to show his support.

“Law.  I was accepted to law school.  I have my undergraduate in criminal justice, so this was the natural next step.  I even hired an interpreter who’s going to help me with my classes until my English is better. I’m going to study International law.”

“What?”  Jimin jumped to his feet with his eyes wide.  “Did you say law?”

“Law baby.  I want to be a lawyer.  The more legal minds we have in this family, the better.”

Jimin sprinted across the floor and tackled Jeongguk to the ground.  He screamed and covered him with kisses, “Law? Law?  That’s incredible.  Oh my God.  Oh my God. I’m so proud of you.”

Jeongguk hugged him back as they rolled about the floor like two children.  But the longer their frolicking continued, the more serious it became, the more aggressive the kisses, the more lustful the moans.  Jeongguk’s growth awakened.  Both of them could feel it but neither acknowledged it.  And judging from its heavy weight against Jimin’s thigh, it was a pretty significant hard-on.  

After a few minutes of kissing and fondling, Jimin tore Jeongguk’s robe away and climbed on top of him.  It had been so long.  He didn’t know how long Jeongguk’s erection was going to last so he had to move quickly.  He had to take advantage of the moment.  Even if he had to cram his dick up his hole himself, he was going to take it. 

But then he heard his lover’s nervous and shaky voice.  “Min, stop.  Please stop.”

Even though Jimin didn’t understand what was wrong, he immediately stopped.  “What is it?” He breathed heavily.  His cock was as hard as a shovel.  Stopping was not easy.  Jimin pulled his robe back on and tried to cover himself.

“I’m worried about this. I know it’s not rational, but...I’m not sure I can do it.  I think I’m...scared.”

That was the absolute last thing that Jimin expected to hear, “Scared?”

“Terrified.  I’m sorry, I’m overthinking it I know.”  Jeongguk looked so innocent but he made no sense.

Jimin tried to understand.  Where had this sudden panic come from?  Why was he suddenly afraid to make love?  Jeongguk’s erection was still there and seemed to be getting feistier by the minute.  Physically he seemed ready to take it on, but mentally something was off.  They had to figure it out, quickly.

Jimin took several deep breaths to calm himself before probing a little deeper, “Tell me everything you’re feeling.  Don’t skip anything.”  

“I don’t want to hurt you.  I talked to Kumo a few days ago and do you know what she said when I told her that I was getting better?  She said, ‘don’t rip him’.  Jimin why did she say that?  What did I do?  Have I hurt you before?  I don’t remember.  I don’t remember doing that at all.  Please don’t try to protect me.  Tell me what I did.  It had to have happened because she repeatedly said it.”

Jimin cooed, “Awww, Kookie, no you never hurt me. Ever.  It never happened,”  Jimin softly corrected him. “It was a joke.  She was joking.”

“That’s not funny…at all.”

Jimin tried to explain, “It was a warning to not be too aggressive, but Kookie,  Kumo has no idea about the intimate details of our sex life.  We’ve always kept that from her.  She assumed, based on her own experiences that our sex was something that it wasn’t.  I don’t know how familiar she is with the beauty of gay love.  I would imagine her only reference point was the deviant shit she saw in whore houses.  You can be a very aggressive and passionate lover, but nothing you’ve ever done has hurt me...not in a bad way anyway.”  Jimin smiled devilishly.  “Besides, I’ve been your pliable bossy bottom for years.  I know how to take a dick punch,” Jimin laughed. 

Jeongguk was quiet.  He and his cock were just not on the same page.  His dick was so hard that it was jumping against his thigh, but Jeongguk himself still sat in heavy contemplation of his dilemma.  Jimin could see the kind reflection in Jeongguk’s face.  For some reason, his detective’s brain had clung to that singularly distorted memory of Kumo’s words.  He had allowed it to overshadow their entire history of love making.  Jimin struggled to figure out what to do.  If Jeongguk felt he was going to hurt him every time they fucked, he was never going to get his bucking stallion back.  He had to prove to him that he was ok. 

 “I love you ok?”  Jimin removed Jeongguk’s robe and left him sitting there on the floor.   Jimin left for a few seconds but quickly returned.  “Don’t move ok?  I’m sitting on you.”  Jimin faced him and then straddled him.  Jeongguk squirmed.  “No, don’t move,”  Jimin released that smile...the one that made Jeongguk’s heart pound like a roaring dragon.

“What are you doing baby?”

“Shhh, trust me.”  Jimin produced a small mirror as well as a never opened bottle of lube.  “Let me show you something.”  He positioned himself on his knees and placed the mirror slightly behind him to reflect the image of his opening.  “Can you see it?”

Jeongguk smiled, “It’s beautiful.”

Jimin giggled, “Be serious.  I’m trying to prove a point.”  He pulled Jeongguk’s fingers into his mouth and sucked them to make them wet and then he covered them with the lube.  “So we’re going to start slow and I want you to watch closely through the mirror.  I’m going to prove to you that you can’t hurt me.”

“But...,”

“...no buts.  Please trust me.  Now slowly, push your two fingers inside of me.  Watch me through the mirror.  Pay careful attention to what you’re doing.”  Jimin held the mirror in place, just centimeters from his hole so that its beautiful reflection could shine up into Jeongguk’s eyes. “Can you see it?” 

Jeongguk nodded, “Yeah, I can.”  He asked as he pushed his first two fingers inside.  The space was warm and it gripped his fingers like a vice as he pushed them inward, “Does that hurt?” 

“It is by far the softest most beautiful feeling I’ve ever experienced.  And see, I’m just fine.  I can handle it.  Now stroke me with your fingers, watch what happens to me each time you move in and out.”

Jeongguk’s large doe eyes were transfixed upon the small shiny mirror that Jimin held against himself.  It was truly the most intimate thing they’d ever done.  He could see the rapid entry and retreat of his fingers as the hole seemed to greedily gobble them up.  He looked away from the mirrored image just briefly to measure Jimin’s face. 

Jimin’s eyes were closed.  He bit his lip as he welcomed Jeongguk’s intimate massage.  He continued to hold the mirror steady even though he was losing himself within his husband’s touch.

Immediately the insecure detective began to feel more emboldened.  But still, his fingers were very different than a lengthy hard dick.  Jeongguk dropped his eyes back down to the mirror.  He felt precum begin to percolate from his tip as Jimin began to slowly rotate against his fingers.  Jeongguk’s mind and his body were finally falling into sync.

Somehow, despite the intense pleasure, Jimin stopped.  “Are you ready for the real thing?”  He asked lovingly.  He was very careful to measure Jeongguk’s responses.  Somehow his husband had fabricated a trauma where none actually existed.  The human brain was a fascinating thing, but this was one situation that Jimin urgently needed to correct. 

“I feel ok.  The mirror is helping.  I need to prove to myself that this is ok.”

“It’s more than ok.  Baby, we’ve done this for years.  Thousands of times.   My entire tunnel was sculpted by your dick.  Trust me.”  Jimin temporarily dropped the mirror on the carpet beside them and then used both of his hands to rub more lube up and down Jeongguk’s shaft.  The fact that Jeongguk was still hard and still maintaining his erection was exhilarating.  Jimin was thrilled.  This was a very, very big step forward. 

As if they were making love for the first time, Jimin gave Jeongguk a few loving reminders, “It’s going to look pretty brutal, but trust me it’s fine.  If you get stuck or it feels like you can’t get through, keep pushing, I’ll help. Don’t stop looking into the mirror, even after you start fucking me,  watch through the mirror, Ok?”

Jeongguk trembled.  He stared directly into Jimin’s eyes, hanging on to every word.  It was the moment of truth.  For the first time is six months, Jimin was going to feel his husband inside of him again.  The man that he thought he’d lost forever.  He held the mirror in place once again, struggling to get the right angle.  He wanted Jeongguk to see everything; every slurp, ripple, pulse and squeeze of his pliant hole.  He found Jeongguk’s eyes to make sure that he could see it.  “Watch it disappear baby.  I’m going to eat it all up,”  he slowly lowered himself over Jeongguk’s tip. 

Immediately, excess lube was forced out as Jeongguk’s cock displaced the liquid from the tight space. He winced, “Oh, oh, baby that doesn’t look good.  Is this ok?”

“It’s fine.  Watch, no ripping.  Its fine.  Keep pushing Kookie. You have to go all the way.  Surely you remember this?   Surely it’s all coming back to you?”

Jeongguk was focused on the mirror.  He was awestruck.  He’d felt this ecstasy one million times, but never had he had a front row seat to the splendor of it all.  Jimin took him; every inch of him. 

Before long, that part of Jeongguk’s body had completely disappeared.  It was all inside of him, all of it was gone.  The only indication of its existence was the hairy patch of fur that sat pressed against Jimin’s ass. 

“You’re in.  See that’s all there is to it.  You did it.”  Jimin kissed him lovingly but Jeongguk’s eyes were still locked on the mirror.  “You see baby, its fine,”  Jimin moaned.

It absolutely wasn’t fine.  It had been a very long time since Jimin had been penetrated.  But he did not dare let Jeongguk know that he was uncomfortable.   Taking him was tremendously difficult because he needed to be worked open, stretched and reacclimated to his husband’s cock.  That would come, but most immediately he had to make him feel comfortable and relaxed. He had to make him fuck him without inhibitions. 

“Watch the mirror ok?  I’m going to ride you.  I’m going to show you that I can absolutely handle you and you can’t hurt me at all.  I’m going to fuck you now Kookie.  Tell me you love me while I do it.”

“I love you so much.  I love you baby, I love you.  I. Love. You,”  Jeongguk repeated over and over.  He watched his meaty cock appear and disappear inside of his husband.  It was like nothing he’d ever seen, so sublime, so intimate, so sexy.  He sighed with each of Jimin’s bounces as his long silken pubic hairs brushed against Jimin’s skin.  He watched with avaricious eyes.  His husband fucked him so beautifully.  It took a moment for it all to sink in.

Jimin held the mirror for the first few strokes just to prove to Jeongguk that he was ok. But as he worked his hips up and down his husband’s pole, he forgot all about the mirror in his hands.  It fell to the floor as he gripped his husband’s shoulders to hang on to him.  His discomfort eased as he acclimated to the stretching of his insides.  He watched Jeongguk’s bulge in his stomach as he pushed and pulled him through his tunnel.  “Fuck, I missed you so much.  So much.” The emotions were beginning to swell.

“I missed you too.  I love you, I love you Min.”  Jeongguk released a gasp as he unconsciously began to rock his hips upwards into Jimin.  His instincts surged while his mind became inundated with memories of making love.  He too had forgotten about the mirror.  The soft light in the hallway casted their silhouettes across the bedroom.  As Jimin rode him, his faced passed in and out of the shadows.  His features were hardened as sweat misted his brow.  Their rhythm was syncopated.  Jeongguk pressed harder into his lover.  He nestled his lips into the crook of Jimin’s neck while his loins boiled hotter and hotter.  He nibbled against the rim of Jimin’s ear as he whispered more platitudes of endless love.

Jimin’s brain went dark and quiet.  All thought was extinguished as his physical awareness ruled over his senses.  He gasped over and over in short violent breaths with full body convulsions to match.  His eyes rolled upwards as he slammed his body down hard against Jeongguk’s lap.  He couldn’t move another inch.  He needed his husband’s full length inside of him as his body jerked into orgasm.  And with it came a flood of loud cries, squaws and bellows as the deeply repressed tears escaped their cage.  His life’s blood had returned.  His husband, best friend, spiritual advisor, and soul mate was back.  His Kookie was in his arms again.  With the emptying of his sexual baggage came the filling of his emotional soul.  Humanity, love and decency were all fucked into him by the only man who could do so. 

Passionate sobs filled the room as Jimin had a total and complete melt down.  The lines between where his orgasm ended and his repressed grief began were completely blurred.  He had never once grieved for his missing husband, his dead husband, his murdered and tortured husband.  Not once.  All of the miserable moments had been held inside of him.  But now, months past their expiration date, he purged all of his raw emotions.

And Jeongguk was there.  There to shoulder his burdens and share his pain.  His faithful partner in love and war.  He cried too.  It was a moment and a memory that supplanted all others forever.  They were back.  They were truly – back.

September 9th, 1967 – Jeongguk’s first day of law school

Jeongguk walked into his sleepy little bungalow that he shared with his husband.  With a sullen face, he looked around, hoping to see his husband nearby.  It had been a bad day and he needed him.  First day of law school and his Professor had given him seven chapters to read on Marbury v. Madison.  His translator overslept and missed class, leaving Jeongguk to work through all of his in class lectures without help.  He was so irritated that he couldn’t even remember the difference between the words see and sea.  For his sake, he hoped that Jimin could help him.

But where was Jimin.  Jeongguk looked around.  His Porche was out front so he couldn’t have gone far.  The television wasn’t on.  That was very strange because it was time for the financial news; Jimin’s favorite time of day.  Typically he would be glued to the television, taking notes and evaluating stock offerings like the money-making, little investment nerd he was. 

The house was dim, too dim.  Naturally, Jeongguk’s first thought was that Jimin couldn’t possibly be there, despite the signs to the contrary.  The windows were open, allowing the cool breeze of the evening to sweep through the small home.  The curtains bellowed as the wind lifted them and danced beneath the sheer fabric.  As he continued to search the house, Jeongguk inhaled the smell of the ocean.  For two boys from the beaches of Busan, the scent of the ocean was like an opulent perfume.  No matter how many times they smelled it, it never grew stale.    

“Jimin?”  Jeongguk called out for him.

There was no answer.  But the quaint little home on the beach was so tiny, that it only took seconds for Jeongguk to find him.  Jimin was in their back bedroom, sitting on the ground with his back against the wall.  He had something in his hands but Jeongguk didn’t immediately recognize it.

Instinctively, Jeongguk reached for the light switch to turn on the lamp...but he thought better of it.  Jimin hated the dark, so why had he willingly immersed himself in a dark room, alone?  Jeongguk looked through the window and found his answer.   

The full moon was there, supporting him, offering Jimin her greatest glow.  Jimin was not in the dark, quite the opposite. He sat quietly in the moon’s protective light as she challenged her rival sun for the title of most luminous and beautiful.   Her light spread across the linear horizon like a streak of lightning that never faded.  She was beautiful, undefeated; glorious like staring into God’s eyes.  And she had come to watch over Jimin.

Jeongguk turned his attention to the thing in Jimin’s hands. “What is that?”  Jeongguk asked.  He was curious about what Jimin had so tightly clutched in his hands.

Instead of answering Jeongguk’s question, Jimin replied with, “Hey.  How was your first day?”

“Tell you about it later.”  Jeongguk said sternly,  “What’s going on Min? Why are you sitting here like this?”

“Therapy today.”  Jimin managed a smile.

Both Jimin and Jeongguk had been in therapy for weeks.  It was a promise that they had made to each other and both had kept their word.  Neither of them found it very beneficial, but their therapists assured them that insights took time.  They weren’t necessarily there to heal, just to learn healthy ways to cope.  But given Jimin’s odd mood, he wondered if Jimin had indeed had some type of breakthrough. 

Jeongguk took a seat right next to Jimin on the floor. 

“Rough day with your therapist?”

“During the session, it was a dead end, but afterwards, I did a lot of thinking.”  Jimin pressed the object in his hands against his chest.

“Tell me about it, if you can...,”  Jeongguk said lovingly.

“I don’t think I loved my dad,”  Jimin said suddenly.  His comment was misplaced because Jeongguk knew for a fact that not only did he love him, but he also respected him.

“Yes you did, because he loved you.  I don’t care what anyone says, no parent’s love ever goes unrequited by their child.  I bet you loved your mother too, in the beginning.  But she worked really hard to kill that love you had for her.  Still, I know you cared for her on some level.  She was your mom.”

Jimin had no response.  Jeongguk’s insight was not an angle that he and his therapist had ever discussed.  It was a completely fresh perspective that caused Jimin to think.  “Maybe...I did love him.  I don’t know.  I haven’t figured any of that out yet.”

“What’s going on,  Min?”

Under the glowing shine of the moonlight, Jeongguk could finally see what Jimin had in his hands. 

“My fedora?”  Jeongguk smiled. 

He hadn’t seen it in almost a year.  In fact, he had just assumed it was lost forever during Jimin’s sudden relocation to the states.  Despite the gaps in his memory,  he remembered everything about his precious hat and how he had obtained it.  He reached to grab it, but once again, his instincts told him no.  Something was off.  Jimin had never ever touched that hat.  He wanted nothing to do with it.  He had no allegiance to it.  Yet he sat there gripping it as if his life depended on it.

Jimin explained further, “We talked a lot about my father today and how terrible he was.  But none of that made me cry.  I recounted the horrors of what I was exposed to when I was a kid.  None of that made me cry, either.  She thinks I’m fucking dead inside.  Maybe I am.  When I came home...I don’t know why...but I pulled his hat from the closet.  And that’s when I realized that I think I hated him.”  Jimin had more on his mind that he needed to share.  It was something that he had never told Jeongguk before, “Kookie, I think you should know something.”

“What is it.  No secrets between us.  Remember?  Whatever it is, tell me,”  Jeongguk said lovingly.

“This hat...it has a different meaning now.”

“How so?”

“The night that I...I mean that thing with Jung...,” Jimin’s voice faltered.

“Say it...the night that you killed Jung and his crew...,”

“...I wore your hat.  It became the perfect symbol for everything that I needed to do that night because it was an artifact shared by the two most important people in my life.  I channeled my dad, while grieving your death.  I could still smell the cherry blossoms in the band.  That hat gave me the barbarianism that I needed to do that deed.  It also fueled my rage and fed my vengeance.  I told myself that everything I was doing was in your memory and that’s why I wore your hat.  I realize now how insulting that was to your honor.  You would have never wanted that.  I besmirched something that was so important to you.  Can you ever forgive me?”

Jeongguk said nothing.  He only listened and absorbed.  The hat was balled tightly in Jimin’s hands.  Whatever internal conflict he was feeling, was transferred to the grip he had on the wool fedora.  Jeongguk’s moonlit eyes moved slowly from Jimin’s pained face to his hat and back again. 

Jimin sighed,  “This hat feels so evil now.  Everything that it represents.  It’s a constant reminder of everything I did.  I know how much you love this thing.  I know how much it means to you, but...,”

Jeongguk rubbed Jimin’s cheek.  Then he gingerly removed the fedora from Jimin’s grip.  He said absolutely nothing.  In his mind, he thought back to how Xio had mocked him for wearing a hat that belonged to he and Jimin’s father.  He mocked him about his obsession with gangster life and how he didn’t have the balls to be one.  Jeongguk agreed that everything that Jimin was saying was right.  The hat represented the worst of both of them.  Jeongguk knew that he could never wear it again.

Jimin watched as Jeongguk stood to his feet and walked out of the bedroom with the hat in his hands.  A few moments later, he could hear the front door softly open.  Jimin stared through the window, wondering where Jeongguk had gone and why he had left so suddenly.  He wondered if he had angered him in some way.  Even though they had come a long way in rebuilding their relationship, there were still awkward moments from time to time.  Jimin wondered if this was one of them. 

But he didn’t have to think for long, because within a flash, Jeongguk reappeared on the beach.  Jimin stood and walked to the window so that he could have a good view of him.  Jeongguk’s movements were mostly camouflaged by the darkness, but it was the sudden eruption of flames that told the story of what he was actually doing.  He had built a fire within their fire pit on the beach.  The light illuminated his determined face. There was a brief pause, as if he were saying goodbye, and then he tossed the entire hat into the fire pit.  The fire flared as it consumed the decades old wool fedora.  For five minutes, it burned.  Jeongguk watched as it turned to ashes, while Jimin watched from the window.  Jeongguk doused the fire and returned to the bungalow.

It was gone.  His last surviving memory of his father was gone.  Once again Jimin was flooded with mixed emotions.  He didn’t know what to feel.  But one thing was clear, he had never loved his husband more than he did at that moment.  Jeongguk reappeared.  Jimin wasn’t sure how to read him.  His energy was – strange.  But the moment their eyes met, he completely understood.

“This is one that we both need to cry about,”  Jeongguk whispered.  “Come here.”

Jimin ran to him and wrapped his arms around him.  Between their lustful kisses, they tore at each other’s clothes.  The destruction of that hat was like a purge they never knew they needed.  No more would Jimin’s father watch over them or remind them of the worst of themselves.  That moment felt like freedom.  Jeongguk pushed Jimin down to the bed.  They had managed to remove almost all of their clothing, except for Jimin’s wine colored robe that brushed softly against their burning skin. 

Sex was their therapy.  Whenever life became so fucked up that they just couldn’t cope, they turned to each other.  The purpose of their union was to draw tears; to fuck it out...as it were.  Jeongguk placed a pillow under Jimin’s waist to elevate him and curve his body into him.  There was tenderness in the way that he lubed him, massaged him.  He wanted a smooth ride, nothing hurtful or shallow.  He needed to make deep passionate love to his husband, to draw out his tears, to save him from himself.  Jimin’s legs were pushed high into the air, exposing his entrance.  Jeongguk leaned down and kissed Jimin’s slit before he gently rocked his dripping dick into it.  He could hear the sound of slickness crawl over his skin as his dick submerged like a submarine in the deep blue ocean.

Without a single stroke, without a drop of fluid, without the sensation of an orgasm, Jimin began to cry.  Quite unexpectantly, he released the exact pain that Jeongguk needed to exorcise from him. 

“Oh, Min.  I know you’re conflicted.  I’m so sorry.  I’m so sorry for what they did to you,”  Jeongguk could feel Jimin’s body shaking as he wept.  There was just so much pain...for both of them.  He comforted him the only way he knew how, by fucking the grief out of him.  He rolled his hips forward and began his commanding strokes; one after the other.  Never had there been anything timid about the way Jeongguk made love. But different occasions evoked different versions of him.  This version of him didn’t care about the climax.  This version of him only cared about the connection; the love they needed to share in order to make them whole. 

“I don’t deserve you,”  Jimin cried as his cock filled with fire and throbbed against his stomach.

“Don’t say that.  We deserve each other,”  Jeongguk reached forward between Jimin’s spread legs and placed a kiss on his lips.  He rested his head on Jimin’s chest as he continued to pump him.  The skin around Jimin’s necklace was peppered with soft loving kisses.  A breathy pant fell from the law student’s lips, “I love you.”

“I’m so sorry...so sorry...,”  Jimin cried louder.

Jeongguk wasn’t sure what Jimin was apologizing for because his elder felt guilt for so many reasons.  But each heartfelt apology broke him down further and further until he cried as well.

Their orgasms were lost.  Jeongguk slammed into Jimin desperately, as if he were trying to crawl inside of him.  They intertwined their fingers and closed their eyes as their heaving chests collided from their frenetic breaths.  Jeongguk sat back on his knees and pushed Jimin’s legs even higher into the air so that he could give him everything.  The bed began to bang against the wall as Jeongguk stroked him through his tears.  Their love was so complicated, yet it felt destined from the womb. 

Suddenly Jimin’s eyes popped open as if he were in shock.  He arched his back and tried to scream, but there was no sound.  His body jerked in sharp convulsions as his cock spewed his orgasmic liquid through the air.  Jeongguk leaned down and capped Jimin’s mouth shut.  He swallowed his mobster’s moans as Jimin’s body continued to writhe in ecstasy.  The mixture of their salty tears dripped upon the pillows and fell to the sheets.  They could taste them, and they could feel their warmth as they settled into the creases around their lips.

“Wrap your legs around me,”  Jeongguk demanded.  Jimin acquiesced immediately.  “Can I cum inside of you?”

“Yes, yes,”  Jimin begged.

“Tell me you love me,”  Jeongguk demanded again.

“I love you, I love you, I love you,”  Jimin smiled even though he was still crying.

And with one final thrust, Jeongguk released his seed deep into Jimin’s body.  He called out loudly, as if someone were stabbing him in the back.  His voice cracked.  It was so good, that it hurt.  Jimin wrapped his arms around him, to support him as he rode the wave of his most powerful orgasm.  They had had sex over the previous weeks, and it had been good, but this was something different.  This was a level that they had never before reached.   

“I should fire my therapist,” Jimin said as he burrowed underneath Jeongguk, “and hire your dick instead.”

“Your therapist is very expensive.  But my dick works for free,”  Jeongguk shrugged.

Jimin laughed.  He slapped Jeongguk on the chest and then kissed his left nipple.  But quickly he sobered, “Are we ok?”

“How can you ask that after what we just did to each other?”  Jeongguk teased Jimin as he threw his legs across his body.

“Because sometimes we have to be ok with not being ok.”

Jeongguk laughed.  Jimin had used his own words against him, “Not this time, baby.  We’re ok.  I promise.”  Jeongguk sat up, “Oh and uh one more thing...I need help with my homework.”   

September 25th, 1967 - Six months after Jimin and Jeongguk were reunited in Key West, Florida

Posco’s new location on the bay of Busan had proven extremely profitable, establishing a transportation hub that created an entirely new industry within the community.  The Busan economy boomed as the Busan division, under the proper leadership of Kumo and her assistant Kim Si-hyuk, created hundreds of jobs for the people of the city. 

With the formation of the IPO, the company streamlined and moved away from the construction wing of the business.  Steel manufacturing and supply became their main source of sustainable revenue. 

Kumo remained the CEO, while Park Jimin and Jeon Jeongguk secretly became majority owners after the launch of the IPO.  Jimin and Jeongguk created a private investment firm named J&J 13 Inc. where they discreetly invested in high growth index funds and lucrative IPO’s.  With J&J joining the team as private consultants, Kumo increased her capital and reduced her overall expenses.

By the fall of 1968, she had won the bid to produce steel for the booming skyscraper business in New York.  She eventually had to open a division of Posco in the United States.  Less than one year after Xio had driven the Busan division bankrupt, Kumo had them back on top. 

As Kosuke promised, the Minister of Affairs, Ji, and all others who were complicit in the bounty that had been placed on Jimin’s head, were rounded up by the Yakuza and summarily eradicated.  Most were placed in prison on various embezzlement, gambling and tax fraud charges. 

Not to be forgotten in the fray was Sergeant Majuk and the bevy of journals that Jeongguk had provided with proof of Ji’s corruption and gambling debts.  In the winter of 1967, during the President’s state of the country address, Majuk rounded up his men and arrested Minister Ji on national television.  Majuk had a solid case with pictures and phone recordings, even tapes.  Kosuke had left no stone unturned in seeking vengeance against the man who had placed a bounty on a member of the Yakuza.  Sergeant Majuk was promoted shortly after Ji was found guilty on all charges.

Three weeks after being sentenced to life in prison, Minister Ji hung himself in jail.  The embarrassment and shame of his crimes finally got to him.  At least that was the story given to his family...

Thanks to Kosuke and the Yakuza, the path had been cleared for Jimin to go home any time he wished.   They had even established new identities for both he and Jeongguk.  Their new names were Kim Seokjin and Park Jungkook.  But, returning to Korea was not Jimin’s desire.  He was no longer needed there and his life had moved on.  He salivated over the new business opportunities in America and he was poised to take full advantage of them.  So with very purposeful intention, they walked away from everything they had once known in Korea. 

Jimin’s new focus was on the opening of his investment and brokerage firm J&J.  And of course the chairman of the board of directors was none other than his faithful husband, Jeon Jeongguk.  The two built a foundation for what would become the first Korean owned brokerage firm to hit the global stock market.

In addition, Jeongguk was now fully focused on law school.  He had also done a great job conquering English.  Long hours were spent in class as he paced his way through the rigors of becoming an attorney.  He loved his new life and had dedicated himself to being a shorts wearing, beach bum who had all of his college bills paid by his Sugar Daddy.  He also was quite fond on sitting on his Sugar Daddy’s face at least one a week.  He really, really loved his new life.

Everything was settled, so they thought.  But the biggest bombshell to ever rock their young lives lurked just days away.

October 29th, 1967 – Mid fuck inside of the most romantic bungalow in Florida

“Do you like it?  Is this how you trained me?  Is this what you want from your little law student Sugar Baby?”  Jeongguk growled in his ear.

“Fuck, oh fuck, I never trained you to do any of this,”  Jimin spouted off as Jeongguk banged him against the wall.

“Oh God it’s so tight in there.  It’s choking my cock.  FUCK you feel incredible,” Jeongguk yelled nonsense as he often did.  “Does my Sugar Daddy like taking it up the ass, fast and raw?”  Jeongguk teased.  From behind, he bracketed Jimin against the wall and drove his dick into him over and over.  He fucked him from every possible angle.  He was definitely no longer afraid of ripping him.

“Holy Fuuuuuuuuuck!”  Jimin screamed as he pounded his fists against the wall. 

Jeongguk was fucking him so hard that he was lifting him off of his feet.  The room was full of the sounds of their thunderous clapping bodies. 

“Oh you like that, huh Sugar Daddy?”

“Keep fucking me like this and I’ll buy you anything.  Anything.  Fucking anything!  Do you want the Empire State Building? I’ll buy it, I’ll buy it,”  Jimin moaned.  His mouth was open and the right side of his face was planted against the wall. 

Jeongguk hovered behind him, strong, dominating and relentless.  “Is my Sugar Daddy going to cry?”

Jimin began to sniffle, “YES!”  He cried as his dick exploded, shooting cum against the wall.

“I love you.”

“I love you.”

“I love you.”

“I love you.”

“Oh my God why is it so tight?”  Jeongguk quivered. 

Jeongguk’s legs were no longer strong enough to stand.  He picked Jimin up and threw him to the bed, before crawling between his legs and entering him again.  He fucked him like it was their first time, animalistic and wild, but done with the greatest of care.  Only he could fuck his Min the way he needed it.  Only him.  As the convulsions started, his pace slowed, until finally he fell across Jimin’s chest and allowed his cock to pulsate inside of his mobster baby. 

When it was all over he asked again, “Why are you so tight in there?”  Jeongguk crinkled his nose while kissing Jimin’s eyelids and cheeks.

Jimin roared with laughter, “I think that’s just how those things are supposed to go.”  He wiped the tears from his face.    

They sat in the bed sipping wine, talking through their busy schedules for the remaining weeks. 

“So, are you ready to face Kosuke?  He’s finally home,”  Jeongguk asked timidly.

“I’m not afraid of Kosuke.  Although I do feel badly for him.  He has invested a lot of faith in me taking this position.  When he finds out that I won’t be taking it, he’ll have to start his search all over again to find his successor.  That’ll delay his retirement.  He and his wife wanted to travel.”

Jeongguk treaded lightly.  So much tension and hostility existed between them over this subject that he needed to be careful not to open old wounds.  “If it means anything, I’m incredibly proud of you for being the one that they chose.  Jimin, I know the Yakuza very well.  For them to even consider placing a Korean at the helm is a tremendous honor.   They want you, Min.  You.  They w ant you and I understand why.  But you don’t need them.  You can do everything you need without them and their baggage,”  Jeongguk said lovingly. 

Just hearing Jeongguk say those words made Jimin cry.  No sex needed.  It was the appropriate emotion to show after being showered by a compliment from the man he respected most on this earth.  The matter was closed.  Settled.  This was the final nail in the coffin that gave Jimin what he needed to move on.

Jimin asked, “What time does your flight leave for Korea?”

“Tonight, Seven.  I’m flying under my new name Park Jungkook.  Like it?”

“Oh how I wish that could be your real name,”  Jimin laughed.  “Tell Lee and Chu-Lun congratulations.  I’ll miss the rehearsal dinner, but I’ll be there in time for the actual wedding.  I only plan to stay in Japan overnight and then I’ll head straight to Korea.  I’m traveling under my new name Kim Seokjin.”

“I like that,”  Jeongguk laughed. 

“My flight leaves tomorrow at 5:30pm.  Did you already buy the car?”

“With a lot of help from Kumo, yes.  I picked Chu-lun’s favorite color.  It’s a pretty over the top wedding gift, but after what she and Lee did for me, it’s the least that I could do.  It was delivered to them yesterday.”

“I think it’s a perfect wedding gift.  You’re a great brother.”  Jimin gave Jeongguk one final kiss before jumping out of bed.  “I better get moving.  I’m only partially packed.  My little law student Sugar Baby interrupted me this morning while I was trying to pack my favorite suits.”

“He’s a menace.  I would stop paying his law school bills if I were you,”  Jeongguk joked.

“Nah, I can’t.  He fucks me too well.”

Later that evening Aboard Eastern Airlines Flight To Korea...

 Jeongguk’s travel adventure for his first trip back to Korea started in chaos.  Poor weather diverted his’s flight through New York.  Then his flight was cancelled.  By sheer luck, he scored a flight on the last flight heading to the Korea.  It was a red eye, scheduled to arrive in Jeju just a few hours before the start of the rehearsal dinner.  He scored the very last ticket available and felt very relieved to have it. 

But as with all things that day, delay after delay plagued him.  He wondered if it were a sign that he shouldn’t be going back to Korea at all.  But Lee and Chu-lun were getting married and he had to be there for them. So, he continued on his way, despite all of the aggravations. 

With no assigned place to sit, Jeongguk was forced to wander through the main cabin searching for an empty seat; preferably one that wasn’t the middle seat, wasn’t in the smoking section and wasn’t near the toilet.  He had a heavy list of demands.  But after five minutes of searching with no success, he lowered his standards.  The airplane was crowded and he quickly went from finding the perfect seat to begging for any seat at all.

About mid-way down the aisle he spotted an empty seat.  It was a middle seat, but on the bright side, it was far away from the toilets and not in the smoking section.  He decided to take it.  Quickly he swung his briefcase over his shoulder and scurried down the tight aisle until he got to row 13. 

“Excuse me,” he said out of breath?  “Is there anyone sitting here?”

The row already had two occupants:  a large man who was asleep with his head wedged into the oval shaped slotting of the window, and a second man who appeared to be Asian sitting in the aisle seat.  His nose was buried in a magazine called, Taekwondo Today.  He barely acknowledged Jeongguk, but did slide his legs to the side so that Jeongguk could step over him to the middle seat.

“Thank you.  Thanks.”

Just as Jeongguk settled, an announcement came over the loud speakers.  “Ladies and gentlemen.  We do apologize but there has been a slight flight delay.  We’re waiting on a family who is connecting from another flight.  Once this airplane gets air born, we will not be able to stop to take on additional passengers, so this is the last flight out for the evening.  We do ask for your patience as we wait.”

Jeongguk had been traveling all day.  His feet hurt, he had a headache and he was hungry.  He just wanted to get on the way to Korea so that he could retire for the evening and sleep for the duration of the trip.  The multiple delays were starting to get to him.  

“Fuck me!”  Jeongguk’s frustration spilled over to foul language uttered in Korean. 

It was the familiar dialect of Korean that caused the man in the aisle seat to lower his magazine. 

And like clockwork, the man echoed the exact same sentiment when he recognized Jeongguk, “Fuck me!”

Jeongguk recognized him right away. He stared as if looking at a ghost, “Hyun?”

“Jeongguk?”

Jeongguk wanted to crawl out of his skin.  What were the odds of seeing this man, on an airplane, in America, after twenty years.  He hadn’t seen nor spoken to Hyun since he was seventeen, now at the age of thirty-five, the man was sitting next to him, staring into his face.

“Damn you look good.  Life has been treating you well,”  Hyun said a bit brashly.

“You look nice yourself,” Jeongguk smiled politely and then immediately blasted himself in his brain.  Nice?  Nice? Why would you use the word nice, you dumb shit?  He screamed to himself.

“This is too weird.  I mean...what...what are you doing here.  In America?” Hyun questioned.  “It’s been what....20 years?”

“I’m headed to Korea to my brother’s wedding.  I live in America.  Florida.  I moved here earlier this year.  Now please answer the same question.  What are you doing here?”

“I live here too – New Jersey.  I own a small chain of karate centers,”  Hyun explained.

Up until that point, Hyun and Jeongguk had been conversing in English.  But as they grew deeper in their conversation, Hyun naturally switched back to Korean. “The Americans have a very healthy appetite for the martial arts.  I teach stars all over the world the correct method of Taekwondo along with the discipline and mind control required to become a true master.  So many of the teachers in this country skip the fundamentals.  My business has grown very quickly.  I’ve even done work with Elvis Presley.”

Jeongguk’s mouth dropped open.  The last time he’d seen Hyun, he was a thug running with the senior Park’s gang South Street.  He was the youngest in the crew but also one of the most vicious because of his deadly fighting skills.  But now, twenty years later, he was a business owner who worked with stars?  It seemed impossible.  Despite the awkwardness of their history, Jeongguk had to know more about how he elevated his life and became so successful.

“But...the last time I saw you...,”

“I sucked your dick so good you wanted to marry me?  Yeah, I remember,”  Hyun joked inappropriately.

Jeongguk turned every shade of red on the spectrum, “No.  That’s not what I was going to say.  I was going to say that you were a thug running around with a notorious gang on the streets of Busan.  How did you end up here?”

“That’s a story...that even I can’t believe.”

“I’ve heard some pretty crazy shit in my day, try me,” Jeongguk encouraged him.

“Fuck you’re hot.  I mean you were a beast when you were a kid, but now, fuck.  You seeing anyone?”  Hyun asked boldly.

“I’m married.”

“Married?  Oh.”  Hyun shifted in his seat.  “I’m sorry.  I hope I didn’t offend you.  I assumed you were gay and I shouldn’t have done that.  Congratulations on your marriage.  But Jeongguk...you’re not...I mean...I know me and you had an attraction back in the old days.  I know it wasn’t just me. You’re telling me that you’re straight?”  Hyun stared at Jeongguk with adoring eyes.  It was extremely inappropriate to question a man’s sexuality, especially in such a public place, but Jeongguk kept his decorum and chose to answer.

“The attraction was not mutual.  I was a dumb kid who didn’t know what I wanted,”  he lied.  It was much easier to just pretend to be straight than it was to admit the truth.  He also didn’t bother to correct Hyun’s assumption of Jeongguk being married to a woman. 

“I bet she’s absolutely stunning. She has to be, to have landed a bunny like you,”  Hyun concluded.

“Thank you.  I love my spouse very much,” Jeongguk smiled.

Hyun continued down a path that made Jeongguk very uncomfortable, “Well, I’ll be honest.  I had a thing for you back in the day, even back in school.  I didn’t care that you were younger than me.  I used to watch you strut around, so arrogant, and cocky.  With those big dimples and sexy eyes.  Shit,” Hyun’s flash back made him sweat. 

Jeongguk pressed to bring him back on topic, “How did you get to America, Hyun.  What drove you to move here and start a new life?”

Hyun blinked several times and rubbed his chin, “God, such a long story.  Where do I even fucking begin?”

“How about the fucking beginning?” Jeongguk snapped. 

“Yeah.  Right.  So - I joined Park’s gang just a few years before his son took over.  Park Jimin.  I’m sure you don’t know him.  You had moved out of Busan by the time he took over.”

“I know him well.  I was the detective assigned to his racketeering case,”  Jeongguk explained.

“You’re a cop?  Fuck me.  You always said you were going to be a cop.  But honestly,  I thought you were going to be a gangster.  You were a conniving little bitch and you would have made one hell of a mobster.  Too bad you went in the other direction.  You know why I sucked your dick all those years ago?”

Once again Hyun had meandered off topic.  Jeongguk began to wonder if he was going to be able to stomach hearing Hyun recount his dick sucking for 15 long hours. 

Jeongguk shook his head, “No Hyun.  I have no idea why you chose to do that to someone who was five years your junior.  There were no laws against that back then, but there are certainly laws in place today. I do hope that you have chosen to surround yourself with people your own age.”

“Oh get your stick out of your ass.  You loved it and you know it.  You would have fucked me if I had let you.”  Hyun told nothing but the truth.    

“Fucked you?  I was a kid.  I didn’t even know what to do with my dick back then.”  Their conversation was quite graphic, but they both safely assumed that no one understood them since they were speaking in Korean, “Besides, you said you weren’t gay remember?”

“I like men and women.  I don’t really give a fuck which,” Hyun said boldly.  He continued with more dick sucking accolades for himself, “You know it was good, stop kidding yourself.”  Hyun smirked.  “I’m ashamed to say that I had a motive behind that.  I gave you a blow job because I was trying to recruit you into Park’s gang.  I knew you liked guys, at least back then you did and  I needed a way to get into your head and convince you to join us.  I was responsible for recruiting the younger crew and you were my target.  I did what I had to do.  Back then, we used to get em’ young.  Fourteen, fifteen, seventeen, we didn’t care.  The younger the better because the young kids could do the petty crimes without going to jail. We needed them.  I wanted you in South Street.  You hung around there all the time, we knew you loved the lifestyle.  You were a perfect candidate.  Plus, I knew you were so in to me.  Be honest, if I had promised to let you fuck me, but only if you joined South Street, would you have done it?”

“Yes.”  Jeongguk said with no shame.  “Which is why preying on children is so pathetic and immoral.  I was too young to think with anything other than my dick.  And you knew it.”

“Relax.  Besides, when old man Park found out we were trying to recruit you, he put a stop to it.  For some reason, after that night, he became very protective of you.  I heard it had something to do with you protecting his drunk ass wife from being attacked.  We weren’t even allowed to speak to you anymore.  He said we were a bad influence, yet he had his own kid Xio in the clubs and restaurants every night.  He exposed him to everything that he tried to protect you from.  He wanted you to stay away from this lifestyle for some reason.  It was weird.  Anyway, I never got to make my move and lure you in.  You were persona-non-grata in South Street.”

Jeongguk was shocked.  He had never heard the story before.  Jeongguk had always assumed that the South Street boys stayed away from him because he no longer wanted to be around them.  He never knew that Jimin’s father had actually forbade them to interfere in his life.  Suddenly Jeongguk became even more interested in Hyun’s story.

“So – was it just me he protected or were there others?”  Jeongguk asked curiously.

“There were others, but my instinct is that you were special because you reminded him of his son, Jimin.  Most of the time, he gave us freedom to recruit whoever we wanted.  The gang had to keep growing and we needed new talent.  But any time any of the kids reminded him too much of Jimin, he made us pull back.  Even though Jimin ended up taking over the gang, I always had the feeling that old man Park felt he was too good for that business, you know?  I wonder if he had a choice, if he would have just let the kid live a normal life?”  Hyun shrugged.  “He used to get drunk and tell us all about Jimin’s grades and intellect and how he was just like his grandfather.  He always said that the kid was bigger than South Street and even Posco.  He would say, ‘My Jiminie, he’s the one that’s going to take over the world.’  He truly loved that kid.  Not sure what he felt for Xio though.  Treated that one more like a pet than a kid.  Anyway, he was a complicated man.  Complicated.  But he was a good mob boss...well at least I thought he was, until Jimin took over.  Jimin was only three years younger than me, yet he ran the business better than any of the Hyungnim’s of the other Kkangpae.  It was all that fancy education I think.  He showed us what a little investment into learning could do.  That’s when I understood what a real leader was.”

Jeongguk turned fully to face Hyun.  The man had aged very well.  With just the slightest crow’s feet around his eyes, he looked very good.  Handsome, just like the twenty-two year old that Jeongguk had a crush on.  He was thankful that he got away from him when he was young because if he hadn’t been stopped,  Hyun would have definitely ended up breaking his heart.   

Jeongguk smiled at Hyun, “Tell me more about how Jimin changed things.”

“Well, that’s the answer to your question.  You wanted to know how I got here.  How I got to America.  It’s because of Jimin.”

“How so?”  Jeongguk was confused.  Jimin had never mentioned anything about helping Hyun immigrate to America.  He immediately suspected Hyun of lying.  But he continued listening anyway.

“When Jimin first hit the streets as Hyungnim, it looked like he was going to be pretty brutal, just like his dad.  But that was all a farce.  Not too long after his dad died, Jimin did a complete 360.  He disbanded all of the side businesses that supported South Street and poured everything into managing and funding Posco.  We lost millions of won because of that decision.  But he went a step further.  He didn’t just disassemble the gang and tell us to leave, he offered alternatives.  Jimin told us bluntly that a group of middle aged, uneducated thugs were of no use to him.  However, properly trained engineers, builders and sales people were very valuable.  So he offered to send us all to school on his dime.  If we could get a degree or learn a trade, he would hire us on legitimately as employees at Posco.  Now most of the older guys, they told him to fuck off and they went elsewhere.  But the younger gang members took him up on his offer.  We went back to school.  We learned how to become accountants and engineers and receptionists.  And true to his word, he hired every one of us.  He changed lives Jeongguk.  Entire legacies.  Many in our generations were the first to go to college.  We were able to return home wealthy, but not because of robbing, killing and stealing, but because of honest, good paying jobs.  He brought integrity back to the community again by almost single handedly eliminating the violent gangs that ran the streets fighting for supremacy.”

“And you?  How did he help you get to this point in your life?”

“He paid for me to go back to school.  I worked at Posco for two years after I graduated.  Then I opened my own business to teach karate.  But there were a thousand karate teachers on every corner in Korea.  So Jimin suggested that I come here.  He knew that I spoke English and thought, wisely, that I could strike it rich in this country.  He knew a lot about America...even had property here.  He paid for my trip and scored me an apartment in Manhattan until I was able to get on my feet.  I opened up my first Karate school in New Jersey and the rest is history.”

“Jimin?  Did that for you?”

“Yeah.  But not just me.  Anyone who showed promise, who wanted better for themselves, Jimin was there to help.  I thought that when he shut down the prostitution rings and the gambling joints that we would be completely run out of business.  But for every penny we lost by shutting down the illegal shit, we tripled through growth of Posco.  The shit that he was able to do with that company had never been done before.  He’s a different guy.  Completely opposite from his dad and his piece of shit brother.  He’s a real good guy.  A super hero in a $3,000 business suit.  It’s hard to explain what this guy means to people.  He’s a real visionary and he had philanthropy in his heart.  Giving and helping others runs through his veins.  It’s pretty weird considering where he comes from. I guess some people were just destined to do certain things...you know?  His true calling was never to be a mobster, but maybe bridge the gap between mobsters and businessmen.”  Hyung laughed.  He felt silly trying to explain his admiration for Jimin.  “You’re a cop.  You’ll never understand what I’m trying to say.  You see him as a thug who should spend the rest of his life in jail.  But the community sees him as something special.  I’m going home, back to Korea for a reunion with old college buddies.  Most of them are former South Street gang members.  We’re all businessmen, property owners, scientists...all because of what Jimin was able to do for us.  None of us ever spent a single night in jail.”  Hyun finished his story and moved on, “So tell me. What’s been going on in your life?  Why did you move to the states?”

The flight attendant came back over the loud speaker. “Ladies and gentlemen, we have our final passengers on board and we will be pushing back and preparing for take-off in just a few minutes...,”

“DON’T CLOSE THAT DOOR!”  Jeongguk screamed over the flight attendant’s speech.  He grabbed his large briefcase from under the seat and wiggled himself free by climbing over Hyun.  “It was so nice to see you.  Thank you for everything.  Everything that you just told me.  Oh God, you...you may have stopped me from making the biggest mistake of my life.  Oh and you were a very moderate dick sucker, not that great.  The best dick sucker in the world is my husband.”  Jeongguk took off running down the narrow aisle.  “STOP DON’T CLOSE THAT DOOR.  I HAVE TO GET OFF!”

“Sir, we’re ready for take-off.  You can’t leave now,”  the flight attendant said angrily.

“I can and I will.  Besides, there aren’t enough seats for that entire family so one of them can have mine.  I have to go, it’s an emergency.”  Before the flight attendant could close the door, Jeongguk flew through the exit and ran back up the tarmac.

October 30th, 1967 – Jeju Island, South Korea

The wedding of Jeon Lee and Chu-lun was set to take place on Jeju island.  Through a very generous donation from her soon to be brother’s in-law, every expense was paid.  Even the travel arrangements for her family and friends was covered.  How she had stumbled upon the love of her life at the age of forty-one was nothing if not a miracle.  Plus he had very wealthy friends and family who spoiled them to no end. 

The love affair between she and Lee was a pure one.  Out of their darkest, saddest moments, they found each other and love blossomed.  Neither Lee nor Chu-lun ever questioned it because they knew better than to question destiny. 

It was a couple of days before the wedding and guests were beginning to arrive on the island.  Most were staying at the Jeju Shinhwa Marriott where the wedding was being held.  Lee and Chu-lun were surrounded by family and for the first time, she was going to meet the infamous, Park Jimin.  She was too excited for words; too excited for sleep.

Kumo was five years older than Chu-lun and six years older than Lee.  Yet she was the least mature amongst them.  She burst into Chu-lun’s hotel room, weighed down by shopping bags.  She smelled of  decadent wealth.  But to chu-lun’s disappointment, she was wearing another expensive fur coat.  This one was black and draped across the floor as she walked.  She fell onto Chu-lun’s bed complaining, with her sultry deep voice full of profanities.

“I swear to God I’m buying Korean Airlines so that I can run the fucking place myself.  What a bunch of fucking idiots.  I cannot fly commercial, I just can’t.  My flight to Jeju was delayed fifteen fucking minutes.  FIFTEEN, can you believe that?” 

Being delayed by only fifteen minutes was definitely a rich people problem.  Chu-lun found it difficult to understand what all of the fuss was about.  She raced to hug her, “KUMO!”

“Hi baby doll.  You look incredible.  Oh – your hair...it’s so beautiful.”  Kumo looked as if she were going to cry.  She ran her fingers through Chu-lun’s soft hair and then gave her a deep hug.  Through sniffles she rambled, “You know, I’m thinking of dying mine white.  Seems more corporate.  You think?  This is going to be a lovely rehearsal dinner.”

“Thank you for coming.  And Kumo don’t you have a private jet?”  Chu-lun asked perplexed.

“Yes, but it’s being used right now by some of my staff.  I had to fly commercial,” Kumo explained.

“You went through all of that for me?  You’re so kind.  You’re an incredible friend.  Absolutely incredible.  I see why Jeongguk adores you.”

“You’re worth it.  Every second of commercial flight misery was worth it.  Speaking of the coma kid, where is he? His flight was supposed to get in last night.  I can’t wait to see him.  It’s been months.  We talk every week on the phone, but it’s not the same.  I can’t wait to wrap my arms around him.”

Chu-lun was not particularly fond of the name ‘coma kid’, but Kumo was a bit brash and Chu-lun had come to accept it.  She moved on, “I’m sorry Kumo, but he’s not going to make it to the rehearsal dinner.  He called Lee from the airport.  Its hurricane season in the southeast.  He’s got weather delays and flight cancellations.  It’s a mess.  But he promised that he and Jimin will be here for the wedding,” Chu- lun explained.

“Oh no, poor thing.  Well you’ve got me, if that means anything.” Kumo hugged Chu-lun again. 

She felt so happy to have friends, real friends.  Kookie and Min were a given but Lee and Chu-lun were quite unexpected.  Her life felt rich and full just from knowing them.  She was a better person because of them. 

“You’ll get to meet my sisters and my dad and mom.  My brother is performing the ceremony, you’ll get to meet him too. By the time this is over we’ll all officially be family.” Chu-lun said.  She looked around at all of the bags that Kumo had with her.  She didn’t recognize any of the names on the bags.  They weren’t designer bags, so what were they?  “But um Kumo, what’s with all of the bags?”

Kumo spun on her heels, “Oh baby, sex.  We’re about to prep you for that honeymoon.”

“Honeymoon?”  Chu-lun’s eyes widened and her heart pounded.  Honeymoon prep from an ex-whore was the plot twist she never saw coming.

Kumo ran over to her bags and began pulling out the strangest things; most were things Chu-lun had never seen before.  She had whips, chains, vibrators, ropes, blind folds, fuzzy handcuffs - every unholy deviant sex toy she could find was represented.

Chu-lun’s mouth dropped open before falling into hysterical laughter, “He’s a former Priest.  Isn’t this a bit much?”

“I’m a former whore and the answer is no.  It’s never too much.  Priests are the freakiest.  I’ll teach you how to use all of it.  You’re going to make him REALLY scream for God,” Kumo smiled with her thick glossy lips and gave Chu-lun a wink.  “Now sit down.  We have to decide which ones you like…,”

October 31st, 1967 –  ACC Headquarters, Tokyo, Japan...

Jimin sat around the large oval table inside of the ACC.  For the last six years, since he had taken over Posco, it had been the designated headquarters of the Yakuza.  The building and the land had both been daring acquisitions by Jimin.  As the founder of the ACC, he maintained a certain clout status, even before he was welcomed into the Yakuza. Regardless of whether he led the organization or not, he would always have their admiration, respect and protection.  He had no concerns over declining their offer for leadership because he knew that they would accept his answer and there would be no hard feelings.  Interestingly enough, the men of the Yakuza were the only group in the world who knew that Jimin was still alive. 

But it was Kosuke who he feared would feel betrayed.  Since their meeting back in May, Jimin had not given any indication of what his decision was going to be – nor had Kosuke asked.  Working through this disappointment was surely going to be a strain on their friendship.  But Jimin was prepared to do everything necessary to help Kosuke find a qualified replacement. 

During their last meeting in this very same room, Jimin had been granted permission to destroy Jung’s crew.  Now almost a year later, he was asking for permission to walk away from it all.  Jimin was not there just to decline their offer to be their new leader, but he also was there to resign his position as official Yakuza.  But of course one never really broke ties with an organization such as that, but he needed to make it clear that he wanted to pursue his life as a private citizen and he no longer needed their protection.  He was confident that the conversation would go well, even though it was unprecedented. 

As the room filled, Jimin felt butterflies in the pit of his stomach.  He would have much preferred to have spoken to Kosuke in private to reveal his answer, as opposed to rejecting him in front of the full counsel of fifty members.  But due to Kosuke’s busy travel schedule, this was the only time available. 

Kosuke entered the room.  He was full of smiles and appeared to be genuinely happy.  Dapper as always, he stood as tall as his tired back would allow.  He looked younger than when Jimin had seen him a few months prior, but Jimin quickly realized it was just an illusion created by the dimness of the room.  Kosuke kept their meeting space purposely dark, in order to disguise some of his physical frailty.  He never wanted to appear weak or old before his very powerful organization.

He immediately floated over to Jimin with his hand extended.  “Welcome, new leader.”  But his smile faded when he saw Jimin’s eyes dart away and fall to the floor.  As he shook Jimin’s hand, Kosuke whispered in a broken flat voice, “Oh Jimin,  I fear you don’t have good news for me.”  Kosuke’s expression changed.  His eyes immediately filled with hurt and disbelief.  He had known Jimin since he was just a small boy, and he understood him very well.  The elder could always sense when Jimin had bad news to deliver.  It was all in his eyes.

As they gathered and took their seats, the phone rang.  Kosuke ignored the call.  The timing was incredibly poor because it was time to call the meeting to order.

“Good Morning brothers.  This meeting is now called to order.”  Kosuke bowed to begin the proceedings.  “I assume you all had safe uneventful travels...,”  the phone rang again.  Once again Kosuke ignored it.  As many of you know, for the last five years we have been in search of a successor to hold the position that is currently occu...,”  the phone rang again.  This time the room rustled as everyone shifted uncomfortably trying to determine who would call during such a secretive, coveted event.  “Will you excuse me?  I’m going to put a stop to this.  I’m sure it’s just someone with the wrong number.” 

Everyone relaxed and engaged in low banter as they waited for Kosuke to handle the ill-timed caller.  Jimin spoke with several members around him as he too waited patiently for the meeting to resume. 

“Hello, I’m not sure who you are, but you’re calling at a very bad time.  I’m sure you have the wrong number.  This number is private and...,”  Kosuke was interrupted by a hurried voice on the other end.  As Kosuke listened to the caller, his face twisted with confusion.  He held the phone close to his ear, with the cord twisting around his body and he turned to face Jimin.  His mouth fell slightly agape and he spoke to his mentee and handed him the phone, “Jimin, it’s for you.”

There was a small rumble of incredulity.  Jimin turned completely red.  He stood from his seat and accepted the phone from Kosuke.  With delicately placed steps across the shaggy brown carpet, he walked towards the phone and turned his back away from the crowd of men who were gawking at him.

“H-h-hello?” He cleared his throat.

“Don’t hang up!  It’s me.  Abort.  Abort.  Abort the mission.  Don’t tell them no!”  The voice on the other line yelled. 

“Jeongguk?”  Jimin twisted around partially to look behind him.  Every single eye in the room was fixed upon him.  He grew a deeper shade of red, something akin to a tomato.  He could feel their stares piercing his back.  “I can’t talk now.  Don’t call again.  Please.  This is not the time.”  Jimin hung up the phone and quickly returned to his seat.  He faced his brothers, “My apologies.  Urgent business matter.  It’s been handled.  We won’t be interrupted again.”

Kosuke quickly resumed his speech, “We’re here to name my successor.  By unanimous vote, we all agreed that Jimin would be the next to be installed.  So now the time has come for him to give us his decision.”  The intro was quick.  Kosuke already knew in his heart what Jimin’s answer was going to be.  He saw no need in prolonging the inevitable.  He handed the floor to Jimin and took a seat.

Jimin stood and bowed, “This is a tremendous honor...I never in a million years thought that I would...,”

Suddenly, the door in the back of the room burst open.  Businessmen, who were former mobsters, did not take lightly to surprise visits.  It typically was a sign of a pending ambush.  Although none of the men were armed, they were all very capable of fighting.  So when Jeongguk came running towards Jimin, they were more than prepared to take him down.

Jeongguk flashed his old police badge, “I need to speak with Park Jimin.  Pardon me for interrupting.  I’m this man’s attorney.   We have an urgent business matter to discuss.”  Jeongguk thundered into Jimin and pulled him out of the room.

Jimin was livid.  He was about to unleash when Jeongguk covered his mouth and held his large hand tightly against Jimin’s face.  “DON’T SAY A FUCKING WORD!  Just listen.  Tell them yes.   Tell them yes.  Do not turn down the offer to be the new leader of the Yakuza.  I was wrong Jimin.  I was so wrong.   I was so busy looking backwards that I couldn’t look forward.  You are the ONE.  You are the one they need to change everything.  Please, take the position.  I will support you 100%, I promise,  I promise.  Please don’t tell them no.  Please.”  He released his hand from Jimin’s mouth to finally allow Jimin to speak.

Jimin clenched his fists and gritted his teeth, “What are you even doing here?  Why are you in Japan?  You’re supposed to be in Korea!  And you’re not my attorney!  You’re a first year law student at one of the worst law schools in Florida.  And...what are you saying?  What do you mean don’t tell them no? I thought we agreed.”

“For a genius, you do not listen well.  Tell them yes.  Take it, take the offer.  I didn’t understand your vision, but now I do.  I really do.  I know you can do incredible things, I realize it now, this is your chance baby.  Please.  Tell them yes.”

Jimin still had questions, “But...but what changed your mind?”

Jeongguk thought for second.  He had no time to fully explain to Jimin how his conversation with Hyun had completely shown him the light.  So instead he quipped, “Let’s just say - you really are the best dick sucker in the entire world.  Now hurry, go before they shoot both of us.”  Jeongguk gave Jimin one final soul crushing kiss of passion before pushing Jimin back into the room and then disappearing.

Kosuke was standing there waiting with his arms folded.  He didn’t look pleased.  “Jimin is there a problem? Are you and the former detective dealing with a personal issue?”

“No - nothing like that.  It was an urgent business matter and it’s handled for good this time.  As I was saying...,” Jimin stepped to the podium and quickly picked up his speech where he left off, only this time he needed to write a different ending.  “It is with great honor that I accept your nomination as the leader of the Yakuza.  Together we will forge a new path where connections, money, intelligence, and hard work rule the day.  We shall put our old ways to rest and redirect our energies towards upliftment, philanthropy and justice.  Today we begin a new legacy.  Thank you for having faith in me.  I will not let you down.”

Kosuke’s face instantly lifted.  The joy in his visage made him look twenty years younger.  He led the group in loud applause as Jimin stepped away from the podium.  He gave Jimin the tightest, most genuine hug before whispering in his ear, “I thought you were going to say no.”

“I was,”  Jimin whispered back.  “But my attorney asked me to um – reconsider.”  He smiled.  Jimin reclaimed his seat while Kosuke said a few parting words.

“Brothers.  Today at the age of 74, I bid you farewell.  I’ll be stepping down as leader of this distinguished organization to spend my remaining days with my lovely wife.  Very relieved that Park said yes, because my plane leaves for Disneyworld in exactly 92 hours.  I have tremendous faith in what you will achieve with Park Jimin as your new leader.  Good luck.  This meeting is dismissed.”

Discarded clothes were littered throughout the hallway as they stripped each other on their way to their room.  Their kisses were so sloppy and passionate that their teeth clicked as their mixed saliva dripped from their mouths.  “What about the wedding?  We have to get there, my flight leaves in an hour.  We don’t have time for this,”  Jimin said as he and Jeongguk burst through their hotel room door at the Remm Hotel in Tokyo. 

Jeongguk twisted himself out of his jacket as they paced backwards towards the bed, “With Jimin’s bottom lip trapped between his teeth, he mumbled, “The Posco jet will be free tomorrow,  Kumo is sending it to pick us up, we’ll have plenty of time. But tonight I’m going to fuck you, ok?”

“Ok.”

“Tonight, I’m going to sit on your face, Ok?”  More clothes went flying through the air.

“Ok.”

“Tonight, I’m going to make you so dick drunk that you don’t even remember your own name. Ok?”

“Ok.”

“Tonight, I’m going to say I love you to the leader of the Yakuza – for the very first time.  Ok?”

“Ok.”  The last of their expensive clothing was tossed away.

“Tonight, I’m going to rip you, Ok?”

“Ok.”  Jimin couldn’t help but laugh. 

The reunion between Jimin, Jeongguk, Kumo and Lee was everything they could have all hoped for.  The three who had been left behind in Seoul could hardly believe how well Jeongguk had recovered.  And even though Lee was no longer a man of the cloth, almost every single time that Jeongguk spoke and laughed and danced, he prayed to thank God for bringing him back.

As Lee and his new wife spun around the dance floor, the two bantered about. “No.”  Lee admonished his new wife.  “That is not an appropriate thing to ask.  He’s not some Hollywood movie star, he’s a mob boss – or at least he was.”  Lee whispered just below the music so that no one could hear their ridiculous conversation.

“But...I’ve never known a mob boss in real life.” Chu-lun’s eyes sparkled.  She was absolutely stunning in her full lace Gucci wedding dress.

“Sweetheart, I love you but I’m not going to sit here and allow you to ask Jimin for his autograph.  These are real people.  Not some fan fiction!”  Lee argued.

“Please,”  Chu-lun pouted.

“May I have this dance?”  Jeongguk stepped in to dance with his new sister in-law.  He also needed to break up the ridiculous conversation that he had overheard between the two newlyweds.

“Hi bub.  Yes you may.  And talk some sense into her.  Make her understand that she cannot ask her new brother in-law for his autograph.”

“Oh, well she already has it.  He signed the wedding card,” Jeongguk winked at Chu-lun.

Lee laughed and left the two to have their first dance.

Jeongguk smiled down at the very pretty Chu-lun, “Thank you for taking care of him, while he took care of me.  He would have never gotten through this without you.  And thank you for not judging me nor my husband.  You are truly my brother’s angel.  I love you Chu-chu.”  He had already started calling his new sister in-law by pet names.  Chu-lun nodded and then cried on the very expensive shoulder of his tuxedo jacket. 

But there was one reunion that was a bit more prickly than the rest.  Jimin had not seen Kumo since she drugged him and shipped him off to America in a coffin.  Although they had made amends and were as close as ever, seeing each other for the first time in almost a year caused repressed feelings to surge forward.  They hugged, said all the right things, but it was not until after the wedding that they finally had a chance to talk.

“May I have this dance?”  Jimin asked the extremely gorgeous Kumo.  She was wearing a long sheer sleeveless gown that was covered in crystals that crawled up her neck.  Her hair was long and wavy and slung over her left shoulder.  She was even more gorgeous than she had been at she and Jimin’s wedding.

“Hi Min.”  Her lips had already begun to quiver.  An explosion of tears lingered precariously in the background.

Jimin swept her into his arms and caressed her cheek.  “I’m so proud of you Kumo.”

“Thank you.  I...needed to hear that.  I know we shouldn’t talk business on such a lovely occasion but I want you to hear this from me.  The U.S. division of Posco is expected to launch in July of 1968.  We’ve finally expanded into America...thanks to you.”

“It was team work really.”

“Congratulations on your new position.  The Yakuza is very powerful but I’m a little shocked that you chose to...,”  Kumo stopped talking.  Bad memories were already rushing back to her.

“It’s not what you think.  We’ll never go down that criminal path again.  We’re officially an investment firm and we’ll be buying up property and stocks, and businesses.  Our emphasis will be on helping small businesses thrive.  I’ll be running J&J in tandem.  We have a plan and none of it includes mob shit.  I promise,”  Jimin explained.

Kumo nodded,  “I trust you.  Only you.”

“And I forgive you.  Only you,”  Jimin smiled.

Kumo looked upwards to stop her tears.  She didn’t want to ruin her mascara.

He continued, “I’ve said this a million times over the phone, but look into my eyes Kumo.”  Jimin lifted her chin so that she could watch his eyes, “I forgive you.  You rescued me. You saved me and Jeongguk.  I will forever be grateful for what you did.  It took tremendous courage.  I married very well.  I love you, Park Kumo.”

As dramatically as possible, Kumo burst into tears.  She was so overwhelmed that she almost fell to her knees.  Jimin had to catch her.  She cried out, releasing sobs of relief.  Months of tension and anxiety poured out of her.  Her tears were tears of joy – even though the other guests thought she was having a mental episode.

Jeongguk didn’t know what was happening, but he ran quickly to be by Kumo’s side.  He helped Jimin carry her to the bar.  It was nights like these when she needed liquor.


The future

Kumo happily dated, but never quite found the gay man she was looking for.  When all was said and done, she had acquired three cats and they were the loves of her life.  In 1970, she adopted a child from Guryong who had lost both of her parents to illness.  Kumo became a mom of a nine year old at the age of 54, even though she only looked 30.

Chu-lun and Lee had a very successful honeymoon.  Kumo was right, Lee was a freak in bed, just like his brother.  Within one year of marriage, Chu-lun was pregnant.  They gave birth to a healthy baby boy in February of 1969.  Jimin and Jeongguk were uncles.

Jeongguk graduated law school in 1971.  He graduated top of his class and went on to work for the Gay Activist Alliance to help protect gay rights in the courts.  He never came out of the closet, but he did openly support the gay community and gay causes in America.  He also learned to speak perfect English.  He never saw Hyun again, but he remained eternally grateful to him for...everything.  Two years later, in 1973, Jeongguk joined his husband and became the official legal counsel for the Yakuza.   

The Jung dynasty was completely destroyed and no one in that blood line ever carried the name of the Ging Street Gang again.

The Yakuza transformed under Jimin’s leadership, just as he promised it would. They became an official investment conglomerate of different businesses that operated under the individual members. They also created a global charity that was managed by none other than Jeon Lee himself.

Jimin kept every promise that he’d made to Jeongguk. They trully had their new start. Their road to redemption, incredibly, did flow through the Yakuza. Between their stake in Posco, the success of J&J, and the operation of the Yakuza, Jimin and Jeongguk lived the rest of their lives walking on the right side of the law. The only problems that they ever faced were aggressive takeovers and hedge fund buy outs. And any time they were challenged, their trusty attorney Park Jungkook, was there to bail them out.

Jeongguk and Jimin continued to live in Key West, with occasional trips to Japan for quarterly meetings and New York to help with the oversight of Posco America. They operated J&J from a small office building on the beach front. They worked every day to redeem themselves and become better people, even restarting their tradition of providing Christmas celebrations for the poor in their Florida community.

And above all, Jimin stepped away from the mafia business for good. Never again did they engage in any type of violent thuggery.

 

The End

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